Matt_192

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Offline (the 12/19/2014 at 1:27am)

Matt_192

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 June 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 20051
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Matt_192 : My names Matt... I'm a Chemical Engineering major at Texas Southern University. I like to draw, do photography, write music, play the trombone and piano, and occasionally try (and fail at) poetry. I enjoy long walks on the beach, taking in the sights and sounds of the dirty water in Galveston, and making small children cry with my horrible singing. Also, I'm a chemistry nerd and I love to learn new things. Oh, and I'm awesome :P

P.S. Conformity is for losers. Be yourself.

Matt_192's page activity

Visits<b>saidoh</b> - the 10/05/2015 at 10:11pm<b>FatKitty</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 2:57am<b>Zeuszara</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 5:06am<b>ThatKidFromLA</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 10:36pm<b>TypicalDaniela</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 6:20pm<b>awesomeamandas</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 1:08pm<b>Tayv412</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 2:56pm<b>PinkPoshling111</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 5:32am<b>swasher</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 12:14pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 1:22pm<b>killerpenguin4</b> - the 12/18/2013 at 2:00am<b>EllaJSwiftie</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 2:31pm<b>RawrImaDragon</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 2:39am<b>PHATERTL</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 10:06pm<b>moldypeaches</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 3:07am<b>paoloescu</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 3:16pm<b>katieflowers77</b> - the 05/09/2013 at 12:45am<b>Sonfang</b> - the 03/25/2013 at 9:38am

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Matt_192's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

by BloodFaerie / 06/30/2012 at 2:49am / United States (Georgia) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

by smart move there / 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm / Ireland (Kildare) / Intimacy

Today, my son thought it was a good idea to spray deodorant into his mouth because he wanted fresh breath. This resulted in him passing out. My son is 17. FML

by Ramis182 / 10/03/2011 at 12:26am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I was babysitting a young boy. I accidentally let a few words slip when I dropped something. He won't stop dropping the F bomb and his mother is coming to get him in the morning. FML

by Kelly / 10/02/2011 at 12:53am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML

by confused / 09/28/2011 at 12:55am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, a man punched me for sleeping with his wife. Bewildered, I insisted I would never sleep with a married woman, to which he retorted "She wasn't my wife when it HAPPENED, dumbass!" I was assaulted for sleeping with my own girlfriend three years ago. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2011 at 3:53pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, my boyfriend bought me a gorgeous ring that I fell in love with. As he slid the ring on my finger for the first time, he started moving it up and down my finger and making loud sex sounds, completely ruining the romantic moment. FML

by Anonymous / 09/27/2011 at 1:30pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend told me she knows I've been cheating on her, and is desperate to prove she's "better than that other slut, or it's over between us." I've been pushed down and forcefully kissed ten times now. All because she saw a pic online of me kissing a girl. It was her. FML

by waj9876 / 09/08/2011 at 8:34pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I picked up a lady's dropped wallet and chased after her despite my sprained ankle. When I finally caught up with her, she smashed her chili sauce filled hotdog across my face and kicked me in the groin, accusing me of stealing her wallet. I was kept at the police station for 3 hours. FML

by fmlsrslyahhh / 09/06/2011 at 3:40pm / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, I was so starved of human contact that I almost took up a transsexual hooker's offer of a "good time." Nothing wrong with that really, but they looked like a haunted tree dressed as Liza Minnelli. FML

by Username / 09/05/2011 at 10:38pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML

by Anonymous / 09/04/2011 at 12:21pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I heard that a boy in my class had written a song about me. Intrigued, I went to see him perform. I spent 3 excruciating minutes listening to a song about 'the girl of his dreams', his tear-filled eyes staring into mine the whole time. I have to sit next to this freak for the next 2 years. FML

by worried / 08/16/2011 at 9:20am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Love

Today, I found out I can't go to my best friend's birthday party. To cheer me up, my parents decided to take me and my brother to my favorite pizzeria for dinner. When I was ready and went downstairs, I discovered they left already. They forgot me. FML

by jordy1995 / 07/16/2011 at 12:25am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized I have no life after I created a fake Facebook account, posted an insulting message on my wall, and then engaged in a vicious argument with it, just so I could impress my friends. FML

by jen / 07/08/2011 at 10:57am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous