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MasterE56's favorite FMLs
by chels / 12/10/2012 at 2:47am / United States (Ohio) / Love
by thatoneperson / 02/17/2012 at 7:43am / United States (Virginia) / Kids
by mattttbob / 02/04/2012 at 5:16am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
by Nixontones / 10/14/2011 at 11:09am / United States (Illinois) / Health
Today, my boyfriend took me on a surprise date to an expensive restaurant. After the meal, he got down on his knee and proposed. We've only been dating for two weeks, so I said no. He just silently kept staring me in the eyes, no matter what I said or did. I ended up having to walk home. FML
by Storm / 09/22/2011 at 11:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, at 7am, I was woken up by a telemarketer. He tried to sell me a bedroom set containing "a comfortable pillow and goose feather cover". I was working the graveyard shift and had only just gotten to sleep an hour earlier. FML
by kareltje / 09/14/2011 at 2:50pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Work
Today, I got home from work to find my wife asleep in her easy chair with my two year old son asleep in a pile of torn-up paper. I soon found out it was my 1960s collection of a Superman comic book series that I inherited from my dad. It was worth well over $2,000. FML
by Randy / 09/12/2011 at 10:15pm / United States (Alabama) / Kids
by Anonymous / 04/23/2011 at 1:11am / United States (Tennessee) / Animals
Today, I walked into a room, where a guy was violently picking his nose. He kept picking. A very pretty girl walked in after me, and he immediately stopped and sat up straight. Apparently, I'm too ugly to motivate strangers to stop excavating their nasal cavities. FML
by uggo / 03/29/2011 at 1:12pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my friend came over with brownies as a treat before work. She works in a bakery so I thought it was lovely. After starting work, I became stoned. She thought it was a great prank. I was fired. FML
by sickly / 02/18/2011 at 8:06am / Work
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