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Martha97

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Martha97

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  • Number of visits : 148
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Martha97's page activity

Visits<b>dead_insects</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 3:22am<b>S4ssyK4t</b> - the 04/27/2013 at 11:09am

Martha97's FML badges

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Martha97's favorite FMLs

Today, I lost a bet with my grandma, and now she's coming with me on my next date. FML

#21020870
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34985) - you deserved it (31683)

On 01/07/2014 at 11:21pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML

#20941762
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21401) - you deserved it (50184)

On 11/01/2013 at 7:55pm - health - by nl4 (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, my girlfriend got a detention for public display of affection. We go to different schools. FML

#20937522
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54273) - you deserved it (4036)

On 10/29/2013 at 12:24am - love - by cmart_9 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

#20837021
189 comments

Today, I found my elderly neighbour on all fours in my garden eating my flowers. FML

#20836671
111 comments

Today, I was at a job interview for a position I really needed. Somehow, the interviewer and I started talking about fishing. I joked, "I'm a master baiter." Needless to say, I didn't get the job. FML

#20833743
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28193) - you deserved it (39350)

On 08/12/2013 at 1:11pm - work - by master baiter - United States (New York)

Today, I was sending intimate pictures to my girlfriend and accidentally sent one to my best friend. He sent me one back. FML

#20690661
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55852) - you deserved it (32860)

On 05/28/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by Abrams52 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60451) - you deserved it (9135)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML

#20618445
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75016) - you deserved it (9082)

On 04/24/2013 at 2:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I met my new girlfriend at her house for the very first time. And her 17 cats, whose names all begin with the letter "K", because they're all "kewl kats." FML

#20601896
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53318) - you deserved it (8642)

On 04/18/2013 at 10:37am - love - by obnum - United States

Today, I told my dad I'm pregnant. His response? "It's only a phase, you'll get over it." FML

#20592767
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53039) - you deserved it (10208)

On 04/15/2013 at 2:04am - intimacy - by twinArmageddon2 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend said he felt like eating icing. So I baked him cupcakes, put icing on them and decorated them. When I handed them to him, he picked off the decoration, licked the icing and handed the cupcake back to me, saying, "I told you that's all I wanted." FML

#20592650
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24208) - you deserved it (48467)

On 04/15/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by Cupcakes (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

#20584918
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50492) - you deserved it (10847)

On 04/11/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I came home from work to find my son and his friends attempting to find out how many of them could fit into one of my pairs of pants. So far, five. FML

#20583359
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40193) - you deserved it (19310)

On 04/10/2013 at 9:26am - kids - by fatmom (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, a couple stopped me on the beach to take a picture of them kissing in front of the sunset. I agreed feeling generous, until they continued making out after the picture was taken, leaving me standing there awkwardly with their camera. FML

#20578428
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44253) - you deserved it (4878)

On 04/07/2013 at 12:26am - love - by unknown - United States (Florida)



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