o:
Today, I popped a pimple before I went to work. On my lunch, I found a new pimple just under the previous one. I'm playing whac-a-mole with my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8388) - you totally deserved it (2225)
On 03/18/2010 at 2:34pm - health - by TooOldForThis (man) - United States (California)
Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21975) - you totally deserved it (1744)
On 01/22/2010 at 3:51pm - misc - by Funnymann - United States
Today, I went to contest a parking ticket in court. I came out 3 hours later, all charges clear, to a new parking ticket on my windshield, for the same amount I just got cleared. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5145) - you totally deserved it (13627)
On 01/22/2010 at 11:28am - misc - by sdfsdf - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I was at the airport about to leave for my business trip. In the restroom, I put my purse on the edge of the sink and got my lipstick out. I leaned closer to apply my lipstick and my open purse fell into the sink, triggering the automatic faucet, filling my purse with water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12010) - you totally deserved it (5084)
On 12/18/2009 at 6:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I looked at my house in Google Street View for the first time and noticed an unfamiliar vehicle in the driveway. When I asked my wife about it, she admitted to have an ongoing affair. Apparently the entire world knew my wife was having an affair before I did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23066) - you totally deserved it (1184)
On 12/18/2009 at 9:31am - love - by cheaters_should_die (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I set up a miniature nativity scene in my apartment. Three hours ago, my dog decided it would be a good idea to eat baby Jesus. Two hours ago, the vet laughed and said not to worry because I would 'have him back in time for Christmas'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13093) - you totally deserved it (2851)
On 12/17/2009 at 9:32am - misc - by gettingacat (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was talking to this guy I like. He's very private and hides all his photos and wall posts on Facebook. Or so I thought, turns out he has me on a restricted friends list, titled "Creepers." FML
I agree, your life sucks (5501) - you totally deserved it (11189)
On 12/14/2009 at 12:03am - love - by creeper (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my colleague rushed off to the hospital for the birth of his first son. Having met his wife at the Christmas party a couple of years ago, I called to congratulate her. Shame I didn't realize it was his mistress having the baby. Guess who broke the news to the wife? FML
I agree, your life sucks (24847) - you totally deserved it (1693)
On 12/12/2009 at 1:02pm - misc - by RBEE (woman) - France (Ile-de-France)
Today, my furnace and all of my heating systems broke down. A fridge is 3 degrees Celsius; it is now 2 degrees Celsius in my house. I would be warmer in my fridge. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19094) - you totally deserved it (868)
On 12/12/2009 at 11:55am - health - by FrozenD - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went to my little cousin's school to pick her up and it happened to be my old elementary school. I saw my old teacher and went up to say hi, and after a few minutes she goes "Aren't you the girl who's dad always came in drunk on parent's day?" Nice to know that's how I'm remembered. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15278) - you totally deserved it (952)
On 12/11/2009 at 10:12pm - misc - by Childhood (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML
I agree, your life sucks (5685) - you totally deserved it (19656)
On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6425) - you totally deserved it (18447)
On 12/11/2009 at 7:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was doing homework in my room when my roommate started meowing all of a sudden. Not only was he meowing, he started to make loud cat noises that resembled a cat being run over by a car. He's gonna be my roommate for the rest of the year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16727) - you totally deserved it (1569)
On 12/07/2009 at 3:54am - misc - by SeeMeInTheDark (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I got a new smart phone and wanted to surprise my girlfriend with a naughty picture with it. A few minutes after sending it, I got a reply back from my girlfriend. And my best friend. And my sister. And everyone on my contacts list. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4869) - you totally deserved it (23797)
On 12/07/2009 at 1:36am - misc - by smart phone mms - United States
Today, I was ecstatic when I got my so-much-waited marriage proposal! I couldn't wait to show off my new ring. Today was also when I found out that he had proposed to his ex a few days behind and she had declined. And yes, it was the same ring. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24013) - you totally deserved it (1512)
On 12/05/2009 at 3:21pm - love - by silverlocket (woman) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)
