Marm87

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Marm87

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1560
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Marm87's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:35pm

Marm87's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Marm87's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss walked in and said something I didn't quite hear, but my co-worker chuckled so to be polite, I laughed with him. They gave me some weird looks. My boss was actually talking about his wife's tumor and my co-worker was coughing. FML

by sucks / 01/05/2011 at 2:41am / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Work

Today, I was on a crowded bus on the way back from my boyfriend's when I suddenly had a terrible nose bleed. I had no tissues, so instead I had to use last night's underwear from my bag. FML

by Anonymous / 12/28/2010 at 5:47am / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, I went to the mall with my daughter. She asked me if she could go see Santa, so I said yes. She made me sit on his lap with her, and that's when I felt something on my bum. Let's just say Santa had a present for me. FML

by hotmommy / 12/19/2010 at 7:23pm / Intimacy

Today, I fell over on the bus. X-Rays revealed not only that I have been growing extra bones in my foot, but that when I fell, I crushed all of them. Doctors don't know how to fix bones that aren't supposed to be there, so they're just going to cut them out. Two days before Christmas. FML

by Anonymous / 12/19/2010 at 4:17am / New Zealand (Otago) / Health

Today, I figured out why my name is Ashley. In order to tell my older sister about getting a new little sister, my parents thought it would be a good idea to make her imaginary friend "Ashley" real. FML

by Anonymous / 12/18/2010 at 4:03am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, while on my honeymoon with my new wife, I tried to be romantic by installing a clapper to the lights in our room. As things progressed, the noise of our love making triggered the lights on and off repeatedly. She began to laugh and we ended up just calling it an early night. FML

by Anonymous / 12/17/2010 at 12:08pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, while in a public restroom I could hear a guy having his way with his hand. He was quoting verses from the bible. I was in a cubicle and he was at the urinal. I was too frightened to leave. This went on for a very long time. FML

by biblewanker / 12/17/2010 at 11:05am / Australia / Intimacy

Today, not only did I miss my bus by seconds, I also saw the bus driver smirking as he drove past me in the middle of the Canadian winter. FML

by peanutface / 12/17/2010 at 8:20am / Canada / Transportation

Today, whilst pleasuring myself in my bedroom, I began absent-mindedly staring at a spider on the ceiling. It wasn't until the point of climax that I realised that I was, in effect, masturbating over a spider. FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2010 at 7:00pm / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Intimacy

Today, while taking a shower, I was enthusiastically singing one of my favorite songs. When I got out, I noticed a bunch of things missing, and a note on my desk saying "shut the f*ck up, you suck." I was robbed and judged by a thief. FML

by Username / 12/13/2010 at 1:10pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years, the father of my son, has been the pervert who has been harassing my mother with weird texts and pictures of his knob. The cops told me after we went to the police station to report it and catch the creep. FML

by grossed the f out / 12/13/2010 at 12:01am / Intimacy

Today, I woke up to an early Christmas present on my car. It was a nicely wrapped box containing a dead bird, a half eaten sandwich, and a note reading "MERRY F**KING CHRISTMAS STAN." This will probably be my only Christmas present. My name is Luke. FML

by Anonymous / 12/12/2010 at 9:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, I got married. Tonight, I received the best orgasm of my life. Not from my husband; from the jacuzzi tub in our honeymoon suite, where he was passed out drunk. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2010 at 9:20pm / United States (Montana) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter and husband decided to surprise me at work. A whole bunch of my co-workers were standing around me when she ran up and hugged me. Her face is level with my crotch. She immediately jumps back from the hug and says "ewwww smells like fish." FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2010 at 9:58pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, after months of cooking breakfast, lunch, and dinner for my husband's grandmother due to her getting a hip replacement, I overheard her calling me a whore over the phone from the next room. FML

by loving grandaughter / 11/27/2010 at 6:28am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous