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MarkToast

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MarkToast

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 143
  • Number of comments : 68
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About MarkToast : im just a kid living in a huge town trying to work out the flaws in my plan for world domination.

MarkToast's page activity

Visits<b>JesusFreak227</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 7:36am<b>Siettadulce</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 5:32am<b>Crazynocatlady</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 3:50pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 8:36pm

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MarkToast's favorite FMLs

Today, on my first day at as a photo editor at a print store, I had to spend over an hour editing a full shoot of a fat man eating a baguette in a bathtub, closeups included. FML

#21242471
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17274) - you deserved it (1525)

On 08/21/2014 at 1:39pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my son said his first word. Unfortunately, that word was "cock." I've tried convincing myself that he's trying to say "clock" but I just can't do it. FML

#21225778
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38491) - you deserved it (6686)

On 07/31/2014 at 12:24pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got rear-ended because my ultra-clingy girlfriend wouldn't let go of my hand long enough for me to shift gears. FML

#21220481
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42563) - you deserved it (9854)

On 07/25/2014 at 5:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

#21213104
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46171) - you deserved it (6218)

On 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm - love - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I decided to tan naked in a secluded part of my yard, so I wouldn't get tan lines. I even felt adventurous enough to leave my bikini and towel inside. This idea backfired however when my mom stopped home from work, assumed I wasn't home, and locked all the doors before she left again. FML

#21207511
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41592) - you deserved it (13561)

On 07/13/2014 at 12:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my coworker called in to say that he couldn't make it to work today because he was in a coma and asked if I could cover his shift. This isn't the first time he's tried to use this excuse. FML

#21203542
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42341) - you deserved it (3377)

On 07/09/2014 at 12:24am - work - by HowAreYouAlive - United States (Virginia)

Today, an elderly lady sat next to me on a bench, and started telling me out of the blue about how bad it is to have saggy boobs. I was uncomfortable enough at the unwanted info, without her then looking at my chest and adding, "But I expect you already know that, dear." FML

#21203054
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41836) - you deserved it (4058)

On 07/08/2014 at 4:52pm - misc - by madamefuxalittle (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, an elderly lady sat next to me on a bench, and started telling me out of the blue about how bad it is to have saggy boobs. I was uncomfortable enough at the unwanted info, without her then looking at my chest and adding, "But I expect you already know that, dear." FML

#21203054
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41836) - you deserved it (4058)

On 07/08/2014 at 4:52pm - misc - by madamefuxalittle (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I walked outside to find my 3 year old daughter and her pet fish playing together on the swings. FML

#21203004
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39609) - you deserved it (4842)

On 07/08/2014 at 3:55pm - animals - by Jack00412 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had to bite the bullet and finally buy maternity pants. Problem is, I'm not pregnant and I'm a 25-year-old man. FML

#21188382
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35305) - you deserved it (22173)

On 06/25/2014 at 8:19pm - health - by Roy Lawson - United States (California)

Today, I got the same feeling in my chest when I orgasmed as when I hit a hard section in Guitar Hero. FML

#21187067
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36226) - you deserved it (7383)

On 06/24/2014 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by massachusettsan (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my 8-year-old son microwaved his pet hamster. FML

#21173596
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52992) - you deserved it (8946)

On 06/13/2014 at 6:53pm - animals - by sunil (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML

#21158120
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44151) - you deserved it (8302)

On 05/31/2014 at 11:05am - love - by wendtinmypants (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

#21151127
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47381) - you deserved it (7214)

On 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm - misc - by great 1st impression (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

#21147237
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46925) - you deserved it (4024)

On 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)



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