MarisaMassacre

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MarisaMassacre

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 23 December 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3613
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About MarisaMassacre : My name is Marisa, I am a sophomore in high school. I live in the worst state in the U.S... Florida. My life is pretty crazy so it should be interesting to have people make fun of what goes on.

MarisaMassacre's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:50pm<b>MrBobby</b> - the 03/14/2011 at 2:55pm<b>JustTh4tGuy</b> - the 07/26/2010 at 10:48pm

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50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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MarisaMassacre's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to take our first shower together. When he came into the room, he had swimming trunks on. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2010 at 1:21am / Intimacy

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. He then told me that he will love me forever, wait for me and will follow me to the ends of the earth. Apparently, that means standing outside my door and calling my house phone every five minutes. It's been 3 hours straight now. FML

by Anonymous / 12/09/2010 at 1:00am / Love

Today, I planned to drop a water balloon on my visiting prankster brother from my new apartment's balcony. As he crossed the street, I launched the balloon, and sent it right behind him. It hit an eight year old on a scooter. FML

by bullseyed / 12/07/2010 at 11:20pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got mugged. After taking my cell phone, the guy politely said: "Thanks. Have a nice evening. Be careful on your way home." FML

by Anonymous / 12/07/2010 at 11:09am / Guatemala (Guatemala) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out a guy I work with has an eye twitch. I thought he was just a winker. I have been winking back all week. He either thinks I'm an asshole or am trying to seduce him. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2010 at 9:38am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I found out that my mom doesn't know my phone number, but she does know the names of both of David Hasselhoff's daughters. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2010 at 12:00am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home from work to find my five year old daughter drawing unicorns on the wall. The same wall that I had to repaint last week because it had puppies on it. FML

by Ed / 12/05/2010 at 8:53am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my boss finally pronounced my name correctly. My name was then followed by the words "You're fired." FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2010 at 7:14pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I got fired from the job I'd had for eleven years for going onto Facebook while on the clock. When I got home, I saw that my boss had updated his status, from work, to "Finally fired that bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2010 at 9:41am / United States (Rhode Island) / Work

Today, it was my birthday. My parents got me a box of cupcakes. My brother got me a deck of cards. My aunt got me a brochure on how to quit smoking. I have diabetes, I don't play cards, and I don't smoke. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2010 at 6:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm at work as a security guard. At a morgue. Why am I here? FML

by Anonymous / 11/18/2010 at 10:04pm / United States / Work

Today, I went to school in my brand new shirt. It was loose fitting and a bit thin, so I wore a sweatshirt on top, intending to take it in once inside. When I got to my seat, I took off my sweatshirt, but also took off my shirt with it, flashing my whole class. FML

by Amanda Ross / 11/18/2010 at 6:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend emailed me this morning to let me know that he had forwarded the joke that I had sent to him to all of his workmates and friends. He was quickly given the heads-up by one of his friends that all of our intimate emails from the day were also included. I'm dating a dumbass. FML

by Anonymous / 11/18/2010 at 11:27am / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I asked my boyfriend to try and man up and act a bit tougher. He started crying. FML

by Anonymous / 11/17/2010 at 9:32pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, the highlight of my day was a conversation about Disney, which ranged from Pocahontas lunch boxes to Disneyland Paris. I don't know who was more excited; me, a 20 year old man, or the 6 year old girl I was talking to. FML

by Anonymous / 11/17/2010 at 2:08pm / United Kingdom / Kids