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Maria_BVB_Army

Offline (yesterday at 3:21am) | Search for a member

Maria_BVB_Army

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 205
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Maria_BVB_Army : Music is my life

Maria_BVB_Army's page activity

Visits<b>carecow</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 5:22am<b>RayvenWhite</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 11:34pm<b>Puffpie</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 9:33pm<b>pratikp03</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 6:07pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 8:47am<b>NOTaDISTRACTION</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 9:20pm<b>Mons</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 4:52am<b>netflixislove</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 10:30am<b>thinblue32</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 12:53am<b>kitcat517</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 10:37pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 6:12pm<b>JosephAnders</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 2:13am<b>frostownz33</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 12:39am<b>Ikari_Shinji</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 2:15am<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 2:36pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 2:42am<b>I_Am_Lamp_</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 5:27pm<b>TumblrAndStuff</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 2:24pm

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Maria_BVB_Army's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to break up with my psychotic bitch of a girlfriend after months of abuse. When she opened the door, her 5-year-old son ran up to me, smiling and calling me "DADDY!" for the first time. Now I don't have the heart to dump the psycho and devastate her son. FML

#21324667
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24061) - you deserved it (3920)

On 12/26/2014 at 12:36pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, a customer came in with a laptop smashed beyond repair. She asked if we could recover her files, but thanks to my idiot boss' new store policy I had to ask her a bunch of questions, including if she had tried "turning it on and off". She stared at me, speechless, like I was a complete moron. FML

#21321539
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32703) - you deserved it (3675)

On 12/21/2014 at 2:08pm - work - by anonix (man) - Canada

Today, I was about to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. As things got heated, he broke down crying. I assumed it was just anxiety so I hugged him and told him it's alright and that it didn't matter, we'd try another time. Half an hour later, he confessed that he's actually gay. FML

Today, my 7-year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of the supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML

#21321028
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28028) - you deserved it (3089)

On 12/20/2014 at 5:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I called this girl I've had a crush on for 2 years to confess my love to her. However, as she picked up the phone, I got so nervous that I froze and couldn't say a word. I was standing there, breathing heavily for 20 seconds. She got so freaked out that she threatened to call the police. FML

#21317815
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30339) - you deserved it (8138)

On 12/15/2014 at 6:59am - love - by LonelyGuy (man) - Australia

Today, I ate at Subway during my lunch hour. A group of teenage girls sat down at the table next to mine. They all shared good laugh about the "friendless, chubby chick" sitting near them, while attempting to discreetly point at me. FML

#21317606
132 comments

Today, I finally told my boyfriend that he's not very good at dirty talk. He does it every time we have sex and it always turns me off. He started crying. FML

#21316697
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31530) - you deserved it (5112)

On 12/13/2014 at 10:20am - intimacy - by Nicole (woman) - United States

Today, I took out my old hairdryer and turned it on. I then gave my roommate a show as I ran out of the bathroom, naked and screaming, after a spider was blasted out of the hairdryer and directly at my face. FML

#21316166
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31743) - you deserved it (4021)

On 12/12/2014 at 11:35am - misc - by lateralligator - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at my daughter's ballet recital, after she was done dancing, grown adults booed. She's five. FML

#21315826
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40454) - you deserved it (2203)

On 12/11/2014 at 8:43pm - kids - by anon - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my teacher how old he was, and jokingly I said, "50?" Then he chuckled, so I laughed and said, "I was kidding… 42, 43, 44?" He then looked at me and said, "Are you trying to guess my age, or your grade percent in this class?" FML

#21315734
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20291) - you deserved it (25777)

On 12/11/2014 at 6:13pm - work - by IHateSchool-.- - United States

Today, since my finals are starting tomorrow, I made a joke about setting my math books on fire. I laughed. Friends laughed. Parents laughed. Guess what subject just managed to actually get in touch with my scented candles? FML

#21315641
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25585) - you deserved it (5344)

On 12/11/2014 at 2:55pm - misc - by not laughing anymore - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, at work, due to a mix up, I had to call an answering service. I am also from an answering service. We got the problem fixed but I couldn't hang up due to company policy. She couldn't hang up either. We both had to get our supervisors for permission to hang up. FML

#21312305
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32510) - you deserved it (3021)

On 12/06/2014 at 12:18am - work - by ring-a-ding-ding (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my neighbor showed me footage of my 7-year-old son spraying his beloved rose garden with weed killer. The whole garden is dead as fuck, and I'm now being taken to small claims court. FML

#21311905
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30695) - you deserved it (6357)

On 12/05/2014 at 8:44am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boss at my new call center job said he'd gotten complaints about me. Apparently I sound "too black" and it's "upsetting" some of our customers. I don't know what that even means, but my boss said I need to "tone it down or we're gonna have some problems". FML

#21310827
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35477) - you deserved it (3204)

On 12/03/2014 at 4:21pm - work - by WTF - United States (Texas)

Today, during a moment of silence in front of the entire high school during my band concert, I managed to hit the stand with my flute, and loudly scrambled to catch it before it fell over. I've never had so many people look at me. FML

#21309681
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25831) - you deserved it (3118)

On 12/01/2014 at 9:06pm - misc - by Silverfeathery -



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