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Malteser95

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Malteser95

31Fucked!

Malteser95Malteser95
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 20 March 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 458
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Malteser95 : Hi there! 😊💜 Welcome to my profile! 😄 I'm Julian, a 20 year old gay guy from the sunny island of Malta 😂☀️ I'm currently studying Psychology at university 📚 I love music, fashion, my friends, and of course Tumblr and FML 💙😃💜 If you'd like to get to know me better, just shoot me a message! 📬 I hope you have a lovely rest of the day 😂😄

Malteser95's page activity

Visits<b>BBlah</b> - 6 hours ago<b>charrbee90</b> - 16 hours ago<b>sevenwondersx</b> - yesterday at 1:35pm<b>buymevickis92</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 7:37pm<b>lulumars</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 2:44am<b>BananaCoconutty</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 12:08am<b>A07</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 8:10pm<b>redlight98</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 5:23pm<b>SKG95</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 4:05pm<b>dannie_jones</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 9:50pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 4:47pm<b>dinosxxrawr</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 3:24am<b>MDoremis</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 1:44am<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 8:06pm<b>flyingmind</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 5:57pm<b>biox</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 12:56pm<b>Rebekha04</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 11:28pm<b>mf727hihi</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 12:19pm

Fucked!<b>buymevickis92</b> - yesterday at 1:38am<b>dannie_jones</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 2:25am<b>flyingmind</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 11:58pm<b>Rebekha04</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 5:28am<b>apineapple</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 12:24am<b>Toutejulie</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 11:46pm<b>royr7395</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 6:10pm<b>vikky538</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 2:22pm<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 12:23am<b>whitnayfortooh</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 3:28pm<b>dbaby115</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 4:44pm<b>nastya_nastenka</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 9:38pm<b>kikoma</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 5:29pm<b>DolphinLaser23</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 4:39am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 5:19am<b>rbrown1231</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 10:50pm<b>mikelwhalen</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 9:29pm<b>zBerryz</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 5:51am

Malteser95's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of Malteser95's badges

Malteser95's favorite FMLs

Today, a dog bit me on the bus. Instead of apologising, its owner said it was my fault because, 'my hands must smell of meat'. I'm a vegetarian. FML

Today, I walked into the dining room to find my mom popping pimples on my dad's back. FML

#21430988
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21915) - you deserved it (3162)

On 06/24/2015 at 1:16am - love - by imblue42 - United States

Today, a guy hit on me. It's such a rare occurrence that I didn't know how to react, so I panicked and said "Sorry, I have to go!" Then I remembered we were on a bus, and just turned around and awkwardly pretended he wasn't there. FML

#21418496
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26531) - you deserved it (6055)

On 05/31/2015 at 9:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I ate at Subway during my lunch hour. A group of teenage girls sat down at the table next to mine. They all shared good laugh about the "friendless, chubby chick" sitting near them, while attempting to discreetly point at me. FML

#21317606
134 comments

Today, I found out I sent several embarrassing videos while under the influence of the meds I was given while getting my wisdom teeth out. When I asked my mom why she didn't take my phone, she said she tried but I started whining and growling at her. FML

Today, I asked my 10-year-old son what he wants to be when he grows up. He smiled broadly and said "A porn star!" FML

#21237548
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38424) - you deserved it (6032)

On 08/14/2014 at 4:44pm - kids - by cahsecuel (woman) - France (Midi-Pyrenees)

Today, I was leaving the grocery store when an old woman started yelling at me for not holding the door open for her. She accused me of being "everything wrong with the younger generation". It was an automatic door. FML

#20937007
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45553) - you deserved it (3039)

On 10/28/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by Greg (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, on his way out of our apartment, my roommate's friend reached over and grabbed a handful of my popcorn. I was only mildly annoyed, until a little later, when I pulled out from between my teeth what could only have been a pubic hair. FML

#20808032
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41917) - you deserved it (3160)

On 07/28/2013 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Slovenia (Ruse Commune)

Today, my mom decided the time was right to give me the sex talk. Towards the end, I had to excuse myself to the bathroom. As I came back, I overheard my dad telling my mom that I'm so unpopular, the only time I'll get laid is when I'm being put in a coffin. FML

#20091141
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36238) - you deserved it (2660)

On 09/27/2012 at 4:14pm - intimacy - by linn (woman) - United States

Today, I discovered that when a cyclist tears down the street, slaps you across the face as he passes, looks back laughing and flips you off, then crashes into a lamppost, he'll still blame you and threaten to sue, even after you rush over to check his injuries. FML

#20014116
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30955) - you deserved it (2133)

On 08/10/2012 at 8:45pm - health - by dumbasdogshit (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I realized that the "holla" tattoo I stupidly got on my lower lip five years ago isn't fading as I expected it to, and will probably contribute to my unemployment for years to come. FML

#19376711
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5822) - you deserved it (67161)

On 03/30/2012 at 3:13pm - work - by bananamuffin - United States

Today, I went to see a dinosaur exhibition with my mum. We walked around and saw a huge dinosaur, made of plastic and rubber. She was very disappointed, saying that she thought there would be real live dinosaurs for us to see. FML

#19309330
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26606) - you deserved it (2276)

On 03/19/2012 at 7:43pm - animals - by bibi (woman) - Slovenia (Bohinj)

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML

#18202922
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30070) - you deserved it (22304)

On 11/09/2011 at 4:52pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, some ballbag broke into my house just to take my broom. FML

#17278350
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28749) - you deserved it (2864)

On 07/27/2011 at 9:50am - misc - by kelsjenks - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to give a reference for a former employee. I tried to say he was always willing to give us a hand on the job. Instead, I said he was always willing to give us hand-jobs. FML

#16448858
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16545) - you deserved it (27947)

On 06/01/2011 at 8:35am - intimacy - by Username - Canada



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