Maleficus

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Offline (the 09/17/2014 at 4:46pm)

Maleficus

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4258
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Maleficus's page activity

Visits<b>TaylorWhiteGirl</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 11:18pm<b>notabeachbabe</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 6:55pm<b>HelloooooNurse</b> - the 12/01/2013 at 4:53pm

Maleficus's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of Maleficus's badges

Maleficus's favorite FMLs

Today, my son was playing The Sims, when I saw him remove the door to a room and set it on fire with a Sim trapped inside. I chuckled at first, until I saw that the Sim was me. Meanwhile, my wife's Sim was happily painting in the next room, not giving a crap. All too accurate, sadly. FML

by Anonymous / 01/03/2014 at 4:50pm / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, my boyfriend wrote me a long poem that ended with, "Please don't get another mister / I regret I screwed your sister". FML

by notakeeper / 01/02/2014 at 10:50pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me two days before my birthday. Only to make it worse, I found out that he had been texting my mother on how to break up with me. To make it even worse, she was giving him tips. FML

by neta_1996 / 01/02/2014 at 9:06pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up hungover and with $13 stuffed in my bra. I'm not a stripper, and I'm not sure how it got there, but that's the most money I've had on me in weeks. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2014 at 12:47pm / United States (Connecticut) / Money

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text message. Every 20 minutes or so, I'll get a notification that I have a new message, and I check it just to find that same message sitting there. I'm being trolled by my own phone. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2014 at 2:49am / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I tried to time my ejaculation to happen right as the new year started. FML

by Lonesome / 01/01/2014 at 1:41am / United States (Louisiana) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend found an old nude of me on his best friend's PS3. I had no idea this guy existed until we moved in with him. FML

by thejanamonster / 12/30/2013 at 2:48pm / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I discovered the real reason my husband was distraught last week and has been acting moodily ever since. An attractive girl he was secretly having sex chats with online confessed to him that "she" was actually a guy. FML

by -__- / 12/27/2013 at 4:49pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, Christmas changed my life. Last year I had a boyfriend to cuddle with on Christmas; this year I have a body pillow of an anime character. FML

by lonely otaku / 12/25/2013 at 2:46am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I went to my dad's house for Christmas. Soon enough, my grandma had commented on how much weight I've gained, my aunt asked me why I'm still single, and my dad joined in by reminding me that I still haven't been accepted into college. Only three more days to go. FML

by holiday from hell / 12/24/2013 at 8:12pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my mom isn't coming to see me for Christmas. Instead she'll be spending it in jail for a DUI and battery. Thank you to my cocklick of an aunt for taking a recovering alcoholic to a bar and pressuring her into relapse. FML

by jhulich / 12/24/2013 at 3:48pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got my period, and had to rush to my parents' bathroom for some pads. They'd put all our wrapped presents in their bathroom. As I was looking, my dad thought I was opening presents and barged in, only to see me with my pants around my ankles. Now he won't stop laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2013 at 12:19pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, like every day since I was born, my name is Yarenis, pronounced "ja-ra-nees. For some reason, everybody pronounce it "your anus". FML

by yarenis / 12/24/2013 at 5:45am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out about my co-workers' new game. Whoever talks to me first loses. FML

by pompomkiwi / 12/24/2013 at 1:09am / United States (Oregon) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML

by .... / 12/23/2013 at 9:48pm / United States (California) / Love