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MainPrism

Offline (the 10/04/2014 at 3:56am) | Search for a member

MainPrism

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 14 October 1987 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2195
  • Number of comments : 111
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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MainPrism's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

#20457945
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28739) - you deserved it (3152)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49358) - you deserved it (4757)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, I unknowingly used my shampoo thinking it was leave-in-conditioner. While walking to work, it started to rain. I started to produce suds. FML

#20443594
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9857) - you deserved it (23486)

On 01/05/2013 at 10:59am - misc - by nomegusta (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML

#20441551
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25783) - you deserved it (5217)

On 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm - health - by WellShit (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, as I have been for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with my mother, she yelled, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML

#20434659
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46519) - you deserved it (7049) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/31/2012 at 5:09pm - misc - by aelia_oups - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to a urinal next to an elderly gentleman. As I was doing my business, he zips up and begins to leave. On his way out, he leans over my shoulder and whispers in my ear, "That's nice". FML

#20424687
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34543) - you deserved it (2763)

On 12/26/2012 at 11:03pm - misc - by hborkowski (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML

#20423578
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50103) - you deserved it (4725)

On 12/26/2012 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She looked pretty thin, so to make her feel better, I said that she looked small. She said "Well, you haven't seen me naked." For some reason, I replied, "Not that you know of." FML

#20417936
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15127) - you deserved it (34981)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

#20417691
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55492) - you deserved it (9867)

On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was burgled while I was on the toilet. FML

#20402014
133 comments

Today, I ran into my infant daughter's room because I thought I heard her crying, and found she was still sound asleep in her crib. The screams were coming from the mouse our cat was using to paint her bedroom walls. FML

#20400604
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26450) - you deserved it (2013)

On 12/15/2012 at 10:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my drunk girlfriend maxed out my credit card, on an "authentic" Jesus Christ autograph on eBay. FML

#20397287
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27756) - you deserved it (4706)

On 12/12/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by maxedoutidiot - United States

Today, while I was at a urinal, a man came up to use the one next to me. He then said, "I guess this is where all the dicks hang out." He then stared at me until I left. FML

#20190054
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20997) - you deserved it (1632)

On 12/03/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by reedcarter -

Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML

#20185812
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7064) - you deserved it (29140)

On 11/30/2012 at 8:28pm - misc - by goodbye cruel world (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

#20184714
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26819) - you deserved it (2920)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

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FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

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