About MagicGiraffe : I'm an 18 year old boy who's trying to figure out who he is.
I you ever want to get to know me or just talk, feel free to message me.
I don't bite, only nibble. ;)
The rules are the rules
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, I bought a new car, and before I left, the dealer offered to help me set up the sync. I agreed, but I really wish I'd remembered that my Bluetooth name is TitsMcGee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3892) - you deserved it (15083)
On 10/30/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by embarassedmuch - United States
Today, I went to the hospital in labor expecting a baby boy. I ended the day with identical twins, a baffled doctor, and a husband convinced that our sons can clone themselves. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18469) - you deserved it (1558)
On 10/29/2012 at 9:30pm - kids - by CutestBoysEver (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I realized that my five-year-old daughters are deranged psychopaths, when one of them started screaming to get my attention while the other pulled the car door shut on my fingers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14816) - you deserved it (1855)
On 10/26/2012 at 12:17pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Philippines (Manila)
Today, after waking up from a drunken night, I realized the burning sensation I had from the lube during sex was because I used hand sanitizer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7890) - you deserved it (28234)
On 10/20/2012 at 9:57am - intimacy - by MIND BLOWING - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I walked into work, after having given my boss a weather prediction last week, so he could decide on which day to open a new company division. I was immediately taken aside and written up for "providing false information, adversley impacting morale". FML
I agree, your life sucks (11896) - you deserved it (1207)
On 10/18/2012 at 3:40pm - work - by johnnyfuckfacer (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, the police searched my house because my neighbors thought we were aiming a gun with laser sight at them. We were only getting our daft dog to chase a laser light around; we don't even own any guns. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14354) - you deserved it (1515)
On 10/15/2012 at 4:33am - misc - by triple l (woman) - United States
Today, while coming out of Walmart, I dropped a $50 bill. Some kid came running up after me yelling, "Hey mister, you dropped this!" as he ran past me laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22797) - you deserved it (3566)
On 03/17/2012 at 9:04am - money - by dhbeaver - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was jamming out and playing some air guitar. I somehow managed to knee myself directly in my left eye socket. I now have a hideously swollen face and a black eye. When people ask me what happened, I'll be hesitant to tell the truth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6991) - you deserved it (16975)
On 03/08/2012 at 4:03am - misc - by wtf - United States
Today, I received the results of the exams that I re-took in order to improve my grades. I got exactly the same grades as before in all four exams. Point for point identical. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10355) - you deserved it (13274)
On 03/08/2012 at 3:06am - work - by stuckonrepeat (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)
Today, I was making out with a girl who I've had a crush on for a while now. It was all going fine until one of my teeth decided to dislodge itself. She promptly spat out the tooth and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21208) - you deserved it (4852)
Today, I was making out with a girl who I've had a crush on for a while now. It was all going fine until one of my teeth decided to dislodge itself. She promptly spat out the tooth and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21208) - you deserved it (4852)
Today, my kitchen nearly burned down because the fire alarm didn't detect the plumes of smoke wafting through the kitchen. This is the same alarm that wails when I use the toaster. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22547) - you deserved it (2067)
On 01/16/2012 at 3:18pm - misc - by Lea (woman) - Denmark (Sjelland)
Today, I'm on a medication that really dehydrates my skin. I thought split lips were the worst side effects. Other split orifices make a trip to the toilet a literal pain in the arse. No sign of stopping in the near future. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17671) - you deserved it (1455)
On 12/20/2011 at 7:46am - health - by ouch (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I was giving a presentation at work, when I said, "But we could care less about that." My boss asked if I meant, "Couldn't care less." Wanting to avoid embarrassment, I tried to think up an excuse, only to end up blurting that it was my phone's auto-correct. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5581) - you deserved it (25838)
On 12/14/2011 at 4:21pm - work - by sharon (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was fired. For "lack of attention to details", specifically spelling errors. My now ex-boss misspelled the name of his own company on my severance agreement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19339) - you deserved it (2034)
On 12/01/2011 at 1:55pm - work - by JadeC - United States (New York)
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
