Maggey

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Maggey

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 24 October 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7422
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About Maggey : I'm a gogo dancer and a rave enthusiast. I don't have much of a direction as far as a "real" job goes. Nursing or something along those lines that pays well so I have the resources to pursue a career as a fetish model/performer. I love my job and the people I work with as well as meeting new people. Feel free to message me if you want.

Maggey's page activity

Visits<b>claudiajean</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 6:46pm<b>PopBlox</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 11:51pm<b>kingdutchhy</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 8:11am<b>Spencyy</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 1:55pm<b>pinkster2014</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 10:07pm<b>paolino</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 9:27am<b>DevilsMetsGiants</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 7:00am<b>hahatofunny</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 9:55pm<b>Coopzorz</b> - the 08/19/2013 at 8:59am<b>DAN_THA_GR8</b> - the 12/24/2012 at 11:08am<b>Pitbull305</b> - the 12/18/2012 at 9:52pm<b>SkiPort</b> - the 09/17/2012 at 8:31am<b>Baustigt</b> - the 07/08/2012 at 8:49am<b>osteobabe</b> - the 07/05/2012 at 1:37pm<b>allmidnighteyes</b> - the 08/11/2010 at 3:47am

Maggey's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of Maggey's badges

Maggey's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on an airplane that was experiencing some turbulence. Feeling anxious, I reached over and grabbed my husband's hand for comfort. He then said, "Why are you scared of dying? You're not even pretty." FML

by Anonymous / 10/16/2010 at 2:44am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my chemistry professor made us all leave our classroom mid-lab because the class was complaining of the smell, and he was worried that there was a gas leak from one of the Bunsen burners. There wasn't, but it's nice to know my "silent but deadly" smelled like it might actually kill. FML

by Anonymous / 09/23/2010 at 12:19pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was emptying the cutlery section of the dishwasher when I reached down and accidentally got the tip of a steak knife wedged half-way under my fingernail. My mum yelled at me for getting blood on the clean dishes. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2010 at 5:37am / Australia (Victoria) / Health

Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML

by Anonymous / 09/09/2010 at 10:00am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML

by FYouBoyfriend / 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, my dad walked in on me singing "Bohemian Rhapsody", while spinning in circles with the cat in my arms. I thought I was home alone. FML

by Hobbsie / 08/29/2010 at 12:54am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, at a restaurant, I was joking around trying to make my friend laugh by pretending to be a ninja. I did this by putting my napkin in front of my face. I happened to look over at another table and saw that a lady wearing a burqa was giving me the most evil glare I have ever seen in my life. FML

by CrushAdrenaline / 08/27/2010 at 5:46am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was working as a camp counselor helping a five year old girl. I heard her mumble, "My grandpa is getting married on Saturday." I enthusiastically replied and told her how exciting that was! Only after did I realize that she said 'buried'. FML

by counselor / 08/25/2010 at 12:32pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

by Bailey / 08/22/2010 at 2:58am / United States (Nebraska) / Kids

Today, while casually sitting at a bar, a drunk biker with no teeth leaned over and tried to kiss me. I'm a sailor in the Navy, but I think I screamed like a little girl. FML

by dentallycorrect / 08/19/2010 at 1:16am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I was fooling around on the trampoline with this guy, when a bounce caused us to bang our heads together, knocking me out cold. FML

by aero00 / 07/27/2010 at 1:08pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, while driving through town, I was distracted by a pretty girl walking on the nearby pavement and accidentally rear-ended the car in front of me. Not only did the pretty girl witness the crash and give a statement, it turned out she was a very feminine man. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2010 at 6:12am / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Transportation

Today, while driving through town, I was distracted by a pretty girl walking on the nearby pavement and accidentally rear-ended the car in front of me. Not only did the pretty girl witness the crash and give a statement, it turned out she was a very feminine man. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2010 at 6:12am / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend woke up wheezing terribly, aching, and sneezing. He's allergic to cats. I have 2 and they are my babies. He gave me an ultimatum, him or the cats. I haven't figured out how I'm going to tell him that I choose the cats. FML

by BambooLove / 07/15/2010 at 2:53am / United States / Love

Today, I was having an affair with a girl from my work. She scratched my back while we were doing it and I didn't want my wife to find out so I threw myself down the stairs at work and ended up having to go to the hospital. FML

by Chichensoup / 05/20/2010 at 10:33pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy