About Maddy_Moore : Hey, I'm Maddy. I'm not all that interesting honestly. Feel free to message me if you want though.
Maddy_Moore's FML badges
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Maddy_Moore's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 10/26/2014 at 6:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health
Today, let's just say it's not always a good idea to storm into your mum's bedroom after hearing several loud slaps accompanied by yelps. What sounds like domestic violence might just be your mum and step-dad's foreplay. For Christ's sake, I need brain bleach. FML
by Anonymous / 10/25/2014 at 5:31pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Intimacy
Today, while reading 1984 on the train, a cute guy around my age and I got into a great a discussion about the book. Just when I thought he might ask for my number, he got up, patted me on the head and said it's so nice that kids my age still took interest in real literature. I'm 25. FML
by anonymous / 10/24/2014 at 9:47am / Austria (Wien) / Transportation
Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML
by too good / 10/24/2014 at 6:54am / United Kingdom (Kent) / Intimacy
Today, my best friend and I, after years of sexual tension, began to have sex for the first time. Things got heated and he decided to abruptly stand up with me around him. I got so nervous, spazzed out, and now have 37 staples in my head courtesy of his bookshelf. FML
by anonymous / 10/23/2014 at 9:25pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, my 17-year-old son managed to easily convince my 13-year-old daughter that if you have sex before getting married, you'll instantly get horrible diseases that will kill you. Her freaking out is how I found out she's not only gullible as hell, but sexually active as well. FML
by Anonymous / 10/22/2014 at 12:09pm / Norway (Rogaland) / Kids
Today, I lost my laptop, but I have my old childhood computer to use. It's password-protected, and the hint to the password is "meaner than Hera." I haven't been into Greek mythology since I was a kid, and if anything, this computer has just shown me how dumb I've gotten over the years. FML
by HeckIfIKnow / 10/21/2014 at 11:36pm / United States (California) / Geek
by Australian Lifeguard / 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Work
Today, I fell asleep on the couch. My parents didn't wake me up, went to bed and set our burglar alarm. If I trip a motion sensor, a siren will go off. The motion sensor in my living room is pointed directly at me and I have to pee. It's been 2 hours. FML
by anonymous / 10/21/2014 at 10:11pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by yus / 10/21/2014 at 3:46pm / United States (California) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/21/2014 at 11:37am / Australia / Miscellaneous
by highfive / 10/16/2014 at 9:27pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, I was leading a tour of my university and saw a girl in ripped jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told her that she shouldn't be representing the school in such a manner. She shot back: "I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck my dick, bitch." FML
by Anonymous / 10/15/2014 at 1:07pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
Today, before work, I was quickly cleaning when I tripped and the side of my neck hit the countertop, causing a dark bruise. During work, people wouldn't stop giving me high fives for getting laid and I was too embarrassed to tell them truth that I'm not desirable, just clumsy. FML
by ForeverAlone / 10/14/2014 at 8:13pm / United States (South Dakota) / Love
by longdrive / 10/14/2014 at 1:17am / United States (California) / Transportation
- Today, my wife came home drunk, telling me all about this amazing man she met at the club with her… Today, I found out that in the three years I've been dating my boyfriend, his parents have secretly… Today, my girlfriend texted one of her male friends, saying she's turned off by the thought of sex…