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Maccat9's favorite FMLs
by tastetherainbow / 07/07/2013 at 6:55am / United States (Texas) / Kids
by yum / 07/07/2013 at 1:09am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, as I was enjoying a nice fish salad, my father looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Ahh, salmon. The 'other' pink meat", then winked suggestively at my mother. I don't think I can ever eat fish again. FML
by ugh / 07/04/2013 at 2:28pm / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Intimacy
Today, I was working as a nurse, and an elderly man had just passed away. As the patient's wife was leaving she said, "Thank you for taking such good care of my husband." Then I, intending to say "Sorry for your loss," said "Thank you for your loss." FML
by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 4:35pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
Today, I was pretending to talk on the phone with my wife just to avoid to speak with my boring coworker. After two awkward minutes of him waiting in front of my desk and me inventing a call, he handed me the disconnected phone cable and left. FML
by LaLince / 06/28/2013 at 4:17am / Switzerland (Aargau) / Work
by not cool / 06/28/2013 at 1:16am / Australia (Queensland) / Health
Today, while running, a man ran up next to me and started jogging with me. He asked if he could run with me and I said yes. Later, when I told him I was going home, he followed me home. When I asked him to leave, he say down on my lawn in protest. He has been there for over 4 hours. FML
by Anonymous / 06/21/2013 at 12:26am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, while running on the treadmill at the gym, I tried to wipe some sweat off my brow before it could make its way down into my eye. I ended up poking myself in the eye so hard that I yelped, stumbled and was thrown off the still-moving treadmill while trying to regain my balance. FML
by Ouch / 06/20/2013 at 11:06pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
by hinting / 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 06/08/2013 at 4:53pm / United Kingdom (Bromley) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 06/03/2013 at 1:47am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by anonymoose / 05/29/2013 at 8:39pm / Australia (South Australia) / Love
Today, my parents yelled at me for 10 minutes without letting me get a word in edgeways for getting a 48 on my test. They took my phone, unplugged my internet, and took my car keys. They wouldn't listen no matter how many times I told them, "It was out of 50". It actually was. FML
by :) / 05/29/2013 at 3:31am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/29/2013 at 12:32am / United States (Wisconsin) / Health
by Anonymous / 05/28/2013 at 7:01pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…