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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4528
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Maccat9's page activity

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Maccat9's favorite FMLs

Today, at the library, somebody left themselves logged in to Facebook on a public computer after they had left. Trying to teach them a lesson, I updated their Facebook status to something outrageous. That's when they came back to the computer after getting something from the printer. FML

by fail / 02/16/2011 at 6:16pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, someone at work put their used, bloodied tampon applicator back in its wrapper, and into the free tampon bin for some sucker to grab. That sucker was me. FML

by bleu_noir / 02/14/2011 at 4:34pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I toured an art museum. Our tour guide had an obvious lisp, so I tried my best not to laugh. When she asked me a question about a sculpture, I accidentally responded "Yeth ma'am". She ended the tour right there. FML

by Sam / 02/09/2011 at 3:56pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in class when all of a sudden I was hit in the head by a metal pencil case. My teacher threw it at me to get my attention. FML

by ouch / 02/09/2011 at 1:02pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I went to get an ultrasound of my reproductive system done because I was having some abdominal pain. Everything was fine until the tech suddenly gasped and said, "Oh my God! You have two uteruses! Want me to print off a picture so you can show them off to your friends?" FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2011 at 6:29pm / United States (South Carolina) / Health

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s teacher asking me to come pick her up. My daughter wouldn’t tell her what was wrong. I left an important work meeting. When I got there she stated her boyfriend broke up with her and she couldn't emotionally make it through the rest of the day. She's 5. FML

by mom21 / 02/08/2011 at 12:46pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was leaving school to get tested for peptic ulcers, because my stomach has been hurting for a few months. To wish me luck, one of my friends gave me a friendly punch in the stomach. I threw up blood. FML

by soccerscout7 / 02/08/2011 at 7:48am / Health

Today, I was dry-walling a house when my butt started to itch. I bent over to scratch it on a piece of plywood, at which point the client's wife walked in and asked what the fuck I was doing. FML

by Shane / 02/08/2011 at 2:58am / Work

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

by bob / 02/05/2011 at 7:02am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I accidentally drank my sister's science project. Her science project consisted of taking a glass of orange juice and putting maggots in it to see if they would live. I thought it was just pulp. FML

by Username / 02/02/2011 at 11:46pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I wanted to annoy my sister by playing the air horn app on my iPhone. I forgot that I had headphones in. Let's just say I quickly had to change my underwear. FML

by Brea / 02/01/2011 at 1:50pm / United States (Missouri) / Geek

Today, I realized that someone spray painted a giant black cock on the front of my house while I was asleep. I also just recently painted my entire house yellow. Yellow doesn't cover up black penis very well. FML

by Stormbringer / 02/01/2011 at 1:37am / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having a bad day at work. Then, on my coffee break, a little boy walked up to me and told me I was the prettiest girl he'd ever seen. I'm a guy. FML

by imsadnow / 01/31/2011 at 3:01pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I acted like I always do when I'm alone in my seemingly sound-proof apartment. I sang loudly, talked back to the TV, used my vibrator. Later, in the silence of the night, I heard my neighbor next door YAWNING. FML

by Anonymous / 01/14/2011 at 4:26am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the doctor's to get a checkup. When the nurse stuck the Otoscope into my ear to look, she was disgusted. When she pulled it out, she told me that I had an ear infection, and that she'd popped a pimple in there by mistake. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2010 at 2:15am / United States (Texas) / Health