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Maaska

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Maaska

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  • Town/Country : Dallas, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 468
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Maaska's page activity

Visits<b>totallylosing</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 10:45pm<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 6:24pm<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 10:31pm<b>HeyTherexxx</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 6:38pm<b>JBrownie123</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 6:34pm

Maaska's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of Maaska's badges

Maaska's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML

#21280696
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29077) - you deserved it (2945)

On 10/18/2014 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my psycho mom walked in while I was chilling and having fun with some friends. She kicked them out and now wants to drug test me, because "Nobody's that happy without drugs". FML

#21280487
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33294) - you deserved it (2382)

On 10/18/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while out for dinner with my parents, a woman, approximately the same age as my mother, repeatedly propositioned me for sex during the course of my meal. After declining firmly several times, she only stopped after my mother convinced her I was gay. FML

#21279658
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32149) - you deserved it (2819)

On 10/17/2014 at 6:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was boxing up all my brother's old stuff to take to the attic. I came across a box, and without checking what was inside, I took it up, just to have it fall on my head, to then find out it was filled with dead baby hamsters. FML

#21276741
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33192) - you deserved it (3203)

On 10/13/2014 at 4:13am - animals - by MissBeyoncé - Namibia (Windhoek)

Today, I went to my grandma's yard sale, only to find my baby pictures being sold for 25 cents each. FML

#21275511
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38020) - you deserved it (2971)

On 10/11/2014 at 10:43am - misc - by Forge (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I woke up to find that my acne has lined itself beautifully in a perfect 'L' shape in the centre of my forehead. FML

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30514) - you deserved it (14069)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my sister told me about her upcoming trip to Mexico. I asked her how she was going to do anything without knowing any Spanish. She told me she's "just going to read their lips". FML

#21272968
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30372) - you deserved it (2232)

On 10/07/2014 at 6:15pm - misc - by epic174 - United States

Today, I finally got around to cleaning out my mother's things after her passing. In the process I found a fancy box. What did it contain? A collection of crack pipes. FML

#21270609
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35690) - you deserved it (2573)

On 10/04/2014 at 10:58am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend and I were roleplaying therapist and patient in bed. When I playfully asked him what bothered him, he told me his mother hates him and burst into tears. FML

#21269125
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37633) - you deserved it (4713)

On 10/01/2014 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by notatherapist - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my girlfriend got up in the middle of sex saying, "You're taking too long, I'm gonna go make some popcorn." I asked her if she could get me some. She said no. FML

#21251846
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41196) - you deserved it (8219)

On 09/04/2014 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by candy man - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

#21251632
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42666) - you deserved it (3183)

On 09/04/2014 at 2:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41622) - you deserved it (7856)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boss slapped me across the face with a raw chicken breast. FML

#21243022
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40430) - you deserved it (4650)

On 08/22/2014 at 8:05am - work - by haileelouxxx (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

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