LysssNysss

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LysssNysss

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 8 September 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 15859
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 58 posted

About LysssNysss : I love FML.

LysssNysss's page activity

Visits<b>dmcintosh</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 6:01pm<b>qwerty401</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 3:46am<b>freedomna</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 5:06pm<b>bitchimabunnyz33</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 1:00am<b>andyhitts25</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 11:45pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 10:02am<b>Mlk313</b> - the 06/08/2013 at 2:31pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 07/23/2011 at 10:06pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:44am<b>McMarlin</b> - the 03/25/2010 at 4:17am<b>peacemadison2012</b> - the 02/12/2010 at 4:46pm<b>RhiannonD</b> - the 07/26/2009 at 2:56am<b>Durf</b> - the 07/26/2009 at 2:03am<b>Four</b> - the 07/25/2009 at 10:16pm<b>Shigaihayashi</b> - the 07/25/2009 at 8:01am<b>prplr</b> - the 07/25/2009 at 5:36am<b>Elsan</b> - the 07/24/2009 at 11:58pm<b>lovelymess</b> - the 07/24/2009 at 10:09pm

LysssNysss's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

LysssNysss's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss sent out an email with the subject line "Urgent". He accidentally left the body of the email blank. I replied to all staff "You're firing blanks Peter". I later heard that his wife once got drunk and told everyone that they couldn't have kids because he has a low sperm count. FML

by Anonymous / 07/22/2009 at 4:16am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, after work, I parked in the parking lot I go to every day to let heavy traffic go by. As I was about to leave, two cops suddenly yanked me out of the car and arrested me for "stocking," as they spelled it on the report. Some paranoid girl thought I was parking there every day to watch her. FML

Today, at martial arts practice, a guest sensei wanted to teach me some "manners". He pinned me down and proceded to choke me while crushing my nuts with his hands and yelling at me in front of the whole class, "DOES THAT HURT?!!?" FML

by GrippedMyBalls / 07/15/2009 at 9:21am / Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi) / Miscellaneous

Today, I logged on to MSN for the first time in a month. In under 10 minutes, I found out that my little sister had changed my screen name to Jake the Weiner, told my friend that he should "suck my d***" and sent an email to all my contacts declaring my love for my best friend. FML

by Jake / 07/01/2009 at 8:28am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife and I went shopping for new glasses at a local store, but we didn't really get to actually buying one. On our way back, she warned me that my glasses of choice should in no way be 'those big arty ones'. When I asked her why not, she told me that I 'look gay enough already'. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2009 at 1:01pm / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Love

Today, my friend and I were in her moms car talking about which job was harder: actor or artist. I said, "Art is easy. You just scribble on a piece of paper and call it abstract art." Her mom squinted at me in the rearview mirror and my friend stopped talking. Then she said, "My mom is an artist." FML

by URGH / 06/28/2009 at 6:08pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was riding my bike without the seat cover on. I hit a curb wrong and the two metal rods from the skeleton of the seat went through my jeans. I went to the med clinic to then find out that I had to get stitches in my scrotum. There were no male doctors. FML

by Anonymous / 06/28/2009 at 2:44pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML

by wtfdreams / 05/17/2009 at 8:33am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my friend and I went to a really expensive restaurant. We got really bad service, so halfway through the meal we decided to dine-and-dash. Turns out I left my purse in the restaurant. With my I.D. and everything inside. FML

by ashleyevans / 04/04/2009 at 10:45am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the doctor because my arm hurt. When he told me I had tennis elbow I said "that's funny I don't play tennis". Then he asked me if I had a girlfriend. When I said no he said "Well I guess we solved this one." FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2009 at 12:34am / United States (Georgia) / Health

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, my parents were taking a tour of my apartment when my bird started making noises. It was mimicking my moans from when I was having sex yesterday. It was screaming in my voice, very noticeably. FML

by Moanie / 03/15/2009 at 6:45pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my parents were taking a tour of my apartment when my bird started making noises. It was mimicking my moans from when I was having sex yesterday. It was screaming in my voice, very noticeably. FML

by Moanie / 03/15/2009 at 6:45pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my parents were taking a tour of my apartment when my bird started making noises. It was mimicking my moans from when I was having sex yesterday. It was screaming in my voice, very noticeably. FML

by Moanie / 03/15/2009 at 6:45pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I met this really attractive guy who introduced himself as Wyan. He was really cool and sweet and we got along pretty well. Then someone informed me that his name is Ryan and that he has a speech impediment, AFTER I had been referring to him as Wyan for quite some time. FML

by hellosaila / 02/27/2009 at 2:58am / United States (California) / Love