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LyraAlluse

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LyraAlluse
  • Town/Country : Mesa, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 23 December 1985 (28 years)
  • Number of visits : 1125
  • Number of comments : 334
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About LyraAlluse : I'm just a humble artist struggling to make a living in the world.

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LyraAlluse's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at my friend's house, when she commented that her dog's fur kept getting tangled because of its length. I reached over to tickle his tummy, felt a big tangled knot and agreed that he needed a good grooming. Then I realized what I'd grabbed wasn't fur. FML

#20523003
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24753) - you deserved it (8971)

On 02/26/2013 at 1:09pm - animals - by Puppylove (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I walked into my dad straightening my dog's fur. His excuse? The dog needed to feel pretty. FML

#20513110
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24414) - you deserved it (3455)

On 02/19/2013 at 2:01am - animals - by xtammyle - Australia (Victoria)

Today, a cute girl asked if my dog was available for a date on Valentine's Day. Thinking I was in luck, I asked if I should come along. She said no. My dog has better game than I do. FML

#20503854
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (567) - you deserved it (2131)

On 02/12/2013 at 4:50pm - animals - by Doggotmytongue - United States (Illinois)

Today, I discovered that my cat recently had explosive diarrhea, and couldn't make it to the litterbox in time. I discovered this when I stepped in the very, very fresh poop with my bare feet. FML

#20503744
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26158) - you deserved it (3655)

On 02/12/2013 at 3:15pm - animals - by Turdfoot (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after three weeks of holding out, my stingy boss finally called animal control about the birds in the air vent above the register. While I was working, they rummaged through the vents, causing live maggots to fall down right in front of me. FML

#20497093
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23756) - you deserved it (1649)

On 02/07/2013 at 2:44pm - animals - by shaviTuT (woman) - Malaysia (Johor)

Today, I learned that my big, tough, strong dog is terrified of spiders when he jumped, knocked over a table and then peed on the spider to drown it. FML

#20495511
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27054) - you deserved it (4039)

On 02/06/2013 at 8:59am - animals - by DogLover (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I blew a huge gum bubble. My cat was on my lap and decided to shove her face in the bubble. There's gum all over her, and I still have scars from the last time I tried bathe her. FML

#20484695
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22944) - you deserved it (8852)

On 01/29/2013 at 12:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

#20483320
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43978) - you deserved it (5786) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm - animals - by Kitten_Love - Sent from mobile version

Today, my roommate and I noticed a foul smell in our apartment. After looking around for a little while, I found that her cat had pooped on a pair of my jeans, and apparently tried to cover it up by dragging a shirt over the mess. FML

#20479640
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20276) - you deserved it (2596)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:18pm - animals - by peteswentzbass - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, I made a new friend: the cricket the doctor pulled out of my ear canal. FML

#20479072
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28132) - you deserved it (2711)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:53am - animals - by Ear Invasion - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I learned my dog had eaten a roll of vet wrap, which is like a long strip of bandage. I learned this when she tried to pass it in the yard today, and could only do so with my help. It seemed to never end. FML

#20477009
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24938) - you deserved it (2483)

On 01/24/2013 at 7:28pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my kitten tried jumping into a hot oven, a dryer, a dishwasher, a toilet, and a fish-tank. Curiosity is going to kill my cat. FML

#20470154
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29860) - you deserved it (3094)

On 01/20/2013 at 8:47pm - animals - by AnonCat (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I've been struggling with my English paper for the past hour, because I can't concentrate. This is because my mom is in the room next to me, singing to her pet rat about what a cute little boy he is, in between yelling at him to stop "molesting" her. FML

#20452365
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25650) - you deserved it (1824)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:02pm - animals - by theycallmekitty (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was walking my dog when he decided that he was too lazy to continue walking. It ended up with me looking like a crazy dog lady carrying my medium-sized dog home. FML

#20448490
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24521) - you deserved it (4497)

On 01/08/2013 at 6:56pm - animals - by life// (woman) - Canada (Alberta)



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