Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

LovesSushi

Search for a member

LovesSushi
  • Town/Country : Washington State
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 31 May 1982 (31 years)
  • Number of visits : 1189
  • Number of comments : 148
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About LovesSushi : I am currently working on my masters in communications and teach at a university. I like to read, write, and do abstract art. If you wanna know anything else, just ask :)

LovesSushi's last visitors

thisguy184Federgirlredraven88terryalypieman528sdroze1389Edogg215pistolpete31000DoubleDie7tjofty

LovesSushi's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of LovesSushi's badges

LovesSushi's favorite FMLs

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

#19554232
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8028) - you deserved it (53117)

On 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, at a concert, I got into a fight with a man in a banana suit. FML

#19546385
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8609) - you deserved it (16001)

On 04/29/2012 at 5:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, it was raining heavily. I saw a large puddle by the edge of the road near with a passing lady. Thinking it would be funny to splash her, I swerved to hit the puddle. The puddle was deeper than I thought. I lost control of the car, spun out, and hit two parked cars. FML

#16276951
495 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10257) - you deserved it (204320)

On 05/21/2011 at 2:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Utah)

Today, I decided to fix my bike and take it for a test ride. Five minutes in, a bee flew into my eye and stung me. In pain, I thought it would be best to go home. I turned around to find a big pitbull running towards me. The dog chased me for a mile before giving up. FML

Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML

#10707989
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16247) - you deserved it (24222)

On 05/23/2010 at 5:21am - misc - by Oops (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML

#2804463
815 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27065) - you deserved it (278818)

On 06/11/2009 at 3:49pm - misc - by ouchers (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481
435 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28759) - you deserved it (133755)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had my high school reunion. The nerdy guy that I picked on all 4 years had married a Swedish supermodel, then divorced her for a Brazilian supermodel. My girlfriend works at 7-11. Karma sucks. FML

#2019724
626 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22020) - you deserved it (253405)

On 05/17/2009 at 4:16pm - misc - by karmasabitch (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had my high school reunion. The nerdy guy that I picked on all 4 years had married a Swedish supermodel, then divorced her for a Brazilian supermodel. My girlfriend works at 7-11. Karma sucks. FML

#2019724
626 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22020) - you deserved it (253405)

On 05/17/2009 at 4:16pm - misc - by karmasabitch (man) - United States (New York)

Today, it's my birthday. I have gotten three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office singing me a happy birthday. FML

#1930337
391 comments

I agree, your life sucks (331707) - you deserved it (15764)

On 05/14/2009 at 1:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I called my husband and he told me that he was going to invite his friend Jeff over that night. I told him I would prefer that he didn't come over. He took it to mean that I wanted to spend time with him and came home with flowers. Then had to tell him I was leaving him. FML

#1212600
378 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12580) - you deserved it (132368)

On 04/21/2009 at 11:24pm - love - by kellym (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML

#1104891
400 comments

I agree, your life sucks (448961) - you deserved it (25561)

On 04/19/2009 at 12:05am - intimacy - by soontobedivorced (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
663 comments

I agree, your life sucks (655857) - you deserved it (48804)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
907 comments

I agree, your life sucks (329207) - you deserved it (35705)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: