Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
This member hasn't filled in the description.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, My Gran Cama Ovar Fir Dinnar, Frhich I Had To Go Grab Soma Supplias From Tha Suparmarkat. I Guass I Should Hava Lockad My Laptop, Bacausahan I Cama Back, I Found My Gran Had Usad My Facabook Account To Proposa To My Now-acstatic Grlfriand. FML
today I went in the diner I always pass by and ordered a sandwich. When I asked how much it was, the waitress replied, ( Don't worry, honey. We give free meals to the homeless on Thursdays. ) I was too ashamed to deny it, so I just said thank u and left. FML
Today, I decidd to be friendly and say i to te werd kid at scool, wo was sitting by imself eating lunc. After I said ello, e stard up at me intensely and said, ( I don't ave many friends. Yea. Mainly 'cause I've eaten most of tem. ) FML
Today, I invited mah new girlfriend over fir the first time. My roommate thought it would be funny to go on a porn site on mah computer an leave it up. She saw it, freaked out, slapped me, an left. FML
Today... yet again... I got looool to my desk at work at 8 AM to find my laptop turned on an porn sites opened. Werd porn sites. I have no idea who is doing this... or how they have access to my office... or how they got my login password. HR thinks I'm making this up. FML
Today, some asshat chewed me out over a 10 cent late fine he was charged on his library card. When I tried to explain the fine to him, he started mimicking me. Finally, as he chucked a dime at mah head before storming out, I saw the glint of a Rolex watch from beneath his power suit. mega FML
Today, my 2-year-old daughter overheard my wife an I arguing an fixated on one particular insult my wife threw at me. Now my daughter won't stop saying "Daddy a numbnuts", always with a big smile on her face. FML
Today , I startd shaking my son's Little Bill doll in frustration , as the batteries weren't working. My nosy neighbor saw through the window and calld the cops. They wouldn't believe me and now thehole neighborhood thinks I'm a child abuser. FML
Today, I textd mah girlfriend to tell her that we couldn't hang out cuz mah dog did this morning an we were burying him!! She replid that she wasn't going to get stood up by a stupid dog!! She then broke up with me!! mega FML
Friday 27 March 2015