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Lone_Wolf_099

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Lone_Wolf_099

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 3877
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Lone_Wolf_099's page activity

Visits<b>sspence</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 2:24pm<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 4:06am<b>hexo21</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 4:37am<b>plantaseedy</b> - the 10/11/2011 at 6:38pm

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Lone_Wolf_099's favorite FMLs

Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML

#18698902
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33402) - you deserved it (5702)

On 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got circumcised by my girlfriend's braces. FML

#18661455
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52310) - you deserved it (10705)

On 12/31/2011 at 4:21am - intimacy - by nickthetank (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

#18483356
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48612) - you deserved it (7728)

On 12/11/2011 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML

#18398754
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31357) - you deserved it (3785)

On 11/30/2011 at 10:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try something new. I ended up tied to the bed, and my girlfriend discovered how ticklish I am. Worst 3 hours of my life. FML

#18391386
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35220) - you deserved it (8057)

On 11/30/2011 at 1:43am - intimacy - by me - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my dogs broke through our electric fence, one of whom managed to get his collar off. I picked it up and, without thinking, went across the fence line. I screamed like a chihuahua being run over by a bulldozer. FML

#18378000
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10426) - you deserved it (33114)

On 11/28/2011 at 6:54pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML

#18370889
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38043) - you deserved it (9346)

On 11/27/2011 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, before my girlfriend gave me a blow job, she put on goggles. FML

#18355284
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31215) - you deserved it (15537)

On 11/26/2011 at 10:09am - intimacy - by hitintheeye - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML

#18336712
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31376) - you deserved it (3279)

On 11/24/2011 at 12:07pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

#18316439
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32943) - you deserved it (3126)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by religionbites621 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

#18312960
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34340) - you deserved it (6024)

On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my daughter in law sent me another romantic text that was meant for her husband. Not only can't she spell for shit, the clichés she uses are horrifyingly embarrassing. The fact this keeps happening makes me want to slam her head in the oven. FML

#18229715
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27313) - you deserved it (4103)

On 11/12/2011 at 4:42pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I dined and dashed. Upon reaching my car, I realized I had left my seven year-old daughter in the restaurant. FML

#18217676
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8593) - you deserved it (108560)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:17am - kids - by embarrassed - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dad made me quit my online school classes and go back to public school, because apparently when I'm on the computer, it makes his video games lag. FML

#18201929
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34232) - you deserved it (5273)

On 11/09/2011 at 2:18pm - misc - by exiledliscense - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I got shot at. Not by police, but by a hunter. While at work. Driving a garbage truck. How the hell a hunter mistook an orange-clad garbageman in a truck for a deer is beyond me. FML

#18188542
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30586) - you deserved it (2522)

On 11/07/2011 at 10:17pm - work - by lprocter1982 - Canada (Ontario)



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