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Lone_Wolf_099

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Lone_Wolf_099

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  • Number of visits : 3411
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Visits<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 4:06am<b>hexo21</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 4:37am<b>plantaseedy</b> - the 10/11/2011 at 6:38pm

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Lone_Wolf_099's favorite FMLs

Today, I was chatting to a nice girl at the mall, and I said if she didn't get a raise, I would write to the management. She said they have no email address, and I replied that I meant an actual letter. "Like, on paper?" she said, "Damn, how old are ya, pops?" I want a ticket off this planet. FML

#19276990
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24840) - you deserved it (3022)

On 03/14/2012 at 11:17am - misc - by S. Michaels (man) - United States

Today, I was working retail when a group of older gentlemen came in looking for a good sound system. I showed them a top-range system and gushed about it in detail, trying to close the sale. One of them snorted and said, "See Dave, girls like her are the reason ball gags were invented." FML

#19268166
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22982) - you deserved it (3496)

On 03/12/2012 at 11:10pm - work - by sandi519 (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

#19264126
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27912) - you deserved it (5907)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States

Today, I was discussing the possibility of other life in the universe with my friend. She said the universe isn't big enough for it to be possible, and that we would know about it already, because "there are only 8 planets in the universe." FML

Today, at work at a gas station kiosk, a man requested a carton of cigarettes. We keep our cigarettes on a high shelf. I'm short and very large chested so I have to jump in order to reach the carton. He said, "I only come here for the entertainment" and left without purchasing his cigarettes. FML

Today, I had to pick my grandma up because she was drunk, at church, at 9am. FML

#19059708
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27755) - you deserved it (2102)

On 02/12/2012 at 8:11pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend came over to my parents' house for dinner. My dad made Holocaust jokes the entire time. My boyfriend is Jewish. FML

#19023656
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32725) - you deserved it (4113)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:17am - love - by daughterofanazi (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to treat a cut on my butt hole with Neosporin. I couldn't see it properly, so I had to use the front-facing camera on my phone. FML

#18973546
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19094) - you deserved it (6143)

On 02/01/2012 at 11:57pm - health - by 11niko (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

#18946444
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21447) - you deserved it (9622)

On 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm - health - by Rachal - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I realized the universal beauty that can be found in a pancake. I'm not sure if I have reached spiritual enlightenment, or if I should have my head examined. FML

#18888534
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17114) - you deserved it (6535)

On 01/23/2012 at 6:27am - health - by Dutchee - Netherlands (Friesland)

Today, while riding back from a weekend away with my boyfriend, we crashed his motorbike, resulting in us getting thrown over a barbed wire fence into a forest. I woke up in hospital. Apparently, in his adrenaline rush, he climbed back on his bike and continued his trip, forgetting all about me. FML

#18868829
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35480) - you deserved it (2779)

On 01/21/2012 at 6:59am - misc - by superficialheart - China

Today, my boyfriend told me that he feels empty inside when I'm not in the kitchen. This is the most romantic thing he has said to me in the past two years. FML

#18804066
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22695) - you deserved it (5824)

On 01/14/2012 at 9:31am - love - by iheartmorons - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boyfriend told me that he feels empty inside when I'm not in the kitchen. This is the most romantic thing he has said to me in the past two years. FML

#18804066
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22695) - you deserved it (5824)

On 01/14/2012 at 9:31am - love - by iheartmorons - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I came home to my fiancé and his mates playing Monopoly naked in our backyard. FML

#18803544
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24176) - you deserved it (3155)

On 01/14/2012 at 6:42am - misc - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my mother threatened me if I keep wearing yoga pants to school, she's going to have my dad pick me up in a speedo. FML

#18778372
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13901) - you deserved it (43166)

On 01/11/2012 at 7:49pm - misc - by ThatOneGirl646 - United States (Michigan)



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