Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Lolly_Poll

Offline (the 02/03/2014 at 3:23pm) | Search for a member

Lolly_Poll

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 15 January 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 976
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Lolly_Poll's page activity

Visits<b>fml0505</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 4:07am<b>winterforever97</b> - the 12/19/2011 at 8:05pm

Lolly_Poll's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of Lolly_Poll's badges

Lolly_Poll's favorite FMLs

Today, in the spirit of Christmas, I let a spider live in my room. I normally kill them, because I'm scared of waking up with one on my face. I woke up with it on my face. FML

#18633962
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29659) - you deserved it (21248)

On 12/28/2011 at 12:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I locked my keys in my car at a gas station. A man stopped to help me with a wire hanger. After about 20 min in the freezing weather, he was getting close to unlocking it when I looked over at the passenger door to see that it was unlocked. All the doors were unlocked but the driver's side. FML

#18632111
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8656) - you deserved it (34917)

On 12/28/2011 at 3:59am - misc - by GeriGeriBoBeri - United States

Today, my 9 month old son realized he is just as tired as I am. His solution is to cry loudly. My solution was to cry along with him. FML

#18631898
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29794) - you deserved it (4606)

On 12/28/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was driving home from work when I saw the woman in the car in front of me throw something out the window. Only when it landed on my windshield did I realize what it was. A bloody tampon. FML

#18626777
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43247) - you deserved it (2281)

On 12/27/2011 at 5:32pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin. I still don't know what to say to him. FML

#18626435
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42204) - you deserved it (8109)

On 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm - intimacy - by blegh (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I woke up to someone screaming "FIRE!" When I sat up, my face went right into my room-mate's ballsack. Apparently it was funny. FML

#18625590
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33721) - you deserved it (5329)

On 12/27/2011 at 2:53pm - misc - by ericane27 - United States

Today, I walked into my elderly grandmother's trailer, used the bathroom and went to wash my hands. She had a soft spot in the floor that she covered with a bathmat. I fell through. Right leg up to my hip in the floor, boobs stuck on the counter. My husband and grandmother stood there laughing. FML

#18624537
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23780) - you deserved it (2678)

On 12/27/2011 at 12:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my 10-year-old brother got the bright idea to urinate in my oven to cool it off. My whole house smells like burnt piss. FML

#18624102
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31056) - you deserved it (2785)

On 12/27/2011 at 10:53am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend referred to her yeast infection as "making bread." I can never look at bread the same way. FML

#18623921
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24899) - you deserved it (2817)

On 12/27/2011 at 10:15am - health - by themuffinman (man) - Japan

Today, my mom convinced me that she and my dad were getting divorced. I have anxiety problems, so I had a panic attack. She then laughed, and said, "Just kidding, I wanted to see your reaction. It's the best so far." FML

#18622971
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31436) - you deserved it (3379)

On 12/27/2011 at 4:42am - health - by somewhatlucky - United States (California)

Today, I was screaming at my neighbor to shut his dog up. After 30 minutes of bellowing, he yelled back that it was my dog that was barking. He was right. FML

#18622052
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6975) - you deserved it (48341)

On 12/27/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Yo mom - United States (California)

Today, despite being 21 years old and living in my own place, my mom still managed to walk in on me whacking off. FML

#18622040
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36801) - you deserved it (9352)

On 12/27/2011 at 2:11am - intimacy - by ikungfuyou (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were at dinner with his parents when he discreetly slid his hand up my skirt and tickled me. This caused me to kick his dad's recently broken leg. FML

#18620963
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32198) - you deserved it (4318)

On 12/27/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by maddie - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, we found out where our daughter had been hiding her crayons. We also found out why our stereo stopped working. FML

#18619223
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21832) - you deserved it (2585)

On 12/26/2011 at 9:24pm - kids - by Peter - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I experienced the most intense pain I have ever had in my life. I was eating blueberries when my sister made a comment which sent me into hysterics. The force of having a bullet-like berry violently shoot out your nostril is more painful than it sounds. FML

#18617176
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25376) - you deserved it (3841)

On 12/26/2011 at 4:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: