About LolliDolly : My name is Veronica, I don't usually comment I just read all the FMLs and comments. I'm usually on the app so you can message me but I might not reply for a long time.
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Today, I had to utter the phrase "OK, but no cape during sex" to my girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23104) - you deserved it (5130)
On 08/19/2011 at 9:40am - intimacy - by nerofirst - Canada (Ontario)
Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29415) - you deserved it (8637)
On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway - United States (Connecticut)
I agree, your life sucks (27486) - you deserved it (3873)
On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I had to tell my teenage son that no, his knowledge of the English language was not passed down to him genetically. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17836) - you deserved it (2417)
On 08/06/2011 at 4:39pm - kids - by Tabby (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, my old neighbor pelted me with apples when I walked out the door. I ducked for cover and asked what her problem was. She yelled, "You took fresh peas from my garden!" I looked at her garden, only to see my dad tiptoeing back to our lawn, laughing and holding a bag full of peas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25750) - you deserved it (2100)
On 08/02/2011 at 2:36pm - misc - by scully11 (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, my 17 year old asked me whether to chew or swallow grapes. I raised this dumbass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22862) - you deserved it (12745)
On 07/29/2011 at 10:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)
Today, while working at Kohl's this woman came up to me and asked if I was Native American, I said yes, she then says "Oh! I thought you guys went extinct." This is the country I live in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35918) - you deserved it (2490)
On 07/29/2011 at 11:18am - work - by crazygirl12 - United States (Missouri)
Today, my mom tried to get me to shoplift. From the dollar store. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24519) - you deserved it (1622)
On 07/24/2011 at 8:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was doing swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your girlfriend's problems! Swim, bitch!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (35363) - you deserved it (4182) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 07/23/2011 at 7:52pm - love - by mathii - Sent from mobile version
Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31111) - you deserved it (8242)
On 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm - love - by John (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31390) - you deserved it (2429)
On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)
Today, after 14 rice-filled days in China, I came back home. What's for lunch? Rice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21607) - you deserved it (6909)
On 07/15/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by panos016 - United Kingdom
Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (65187) - you deserved it (6888)
On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I woke up to my pants off and my vibrator still on. I fell asleep masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16577) - you deserved it (39323)
On 07/12/2011 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by 44haley44 - United States
Today, I realized that my wife is such a bitch normally, she's actually nicer when she is on her period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28758) - you deserved it (6737)
On 07/09/2011 at 12:32am - misc - by Username - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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