LolliDolly

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LolliDolly

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LolliDollyLolliDolly
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 May 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6848
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About LolliDolly : Hi, I'm Noelia or Ellie. Looking for laughs but I just end up feeling very sympathetic a lot of the time.

Cosmetology student. 19 years old. Awful sense of humor and bad puns.

LolliDolly's page activity

Visits<b>Captobvious19</b> - the 11/27/2016 at 6:37pm<b>iamscott</b> - the 11/16/2016 at 12:54pm<b>webmdbag</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 12:31am<b>sandman676</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 3:07am<b>mbdresnick</b> - the 09/10/2016 at 11:58am<b>chewsef</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 7:35pm<b>misspeach13</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 3:29am<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 10:25pm<b>Taymoo1515</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 3:53am<b>399</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 9:40pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 11:44am<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 6:09pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 1:35am<b>dno79</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 4:32pm<b>nioclas_hav</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 2:28pm<b>pred8885</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 12:37pm<b>TC2Flee</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 11:58pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 9:19pm

Fucked!<b>sandman676</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 9:07am<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 7:35am<b>JadeOmega</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 5:27pm<b>owlhead1</b> - the 04/02/2016 at 6:52am<b>incoherentrmblr</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 7:23pm

LolliDolly's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of LolliDolly's badges

LolliDolly's favorite FMLs

Today, some pig slapped my ass as he passed me in the street, then looked back at me with a dirty grin. His grin turned to horror when he realized that I'm actually a guy, then to anger as he bitched me out for "tricking" him by "looking like a chick". FML

by 404: sense not found / 06/08/2014 at 2:32pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend wanted to make breakfast. Since I usually do all the cooking, I said that was fine. Four hours later, my boyfriend and I were sitting on the sidewalk across the street as the firemen sprayed down the burnt remains of our kitchen. FML

by Un1ucky / 06/07/2014 at 11:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I searched up ways to fix my eyebrows since they were so bushy and thick. I took my tweezers and set to work. It went to shit. So now, I have one completely straight eyebrow that makes me look like Bert from Sesame Street and another that's arched like Nina Dobrev's. FML

Today, I came down with diarrhea thanks to a particularly low-class restaurant. My dad has been making constant stupid puns like "pretty shitty state you're in" and "this day and age, you just don't expect this crap". I'm at the point where I want to gouge his eyes out with a goddamn spoon. FML

by fuckmuppet / 05/27/2014 at 1:04pm / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Health

Today, I told my 4-year-old neighbor that I'm pregnant. His response was to attack me with a stick "for swallowing a baby." Three people had to pull him off. FML

by Baby eater / 05/19/2014 at 8:00pm / United States (Tennessee) / Kids

Today, I took my son to lunch. After we ate, the waitress came over and told me that my son was the most well-behaved child they had ever had there. His response was to pull his pants down and moon the entire restaurant while smacking his bottom. FML

by BekkyLove15 / 05/18/2014 at 8:12pm / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got a new dentist. You know how most dentists play soft, relaxing music? Well this guy seems to like rap a lot, and it's kinda hard getting your teeth cleaned to the sound of bullets going off. FML

by randomusername99 / 05/05/2014 at 5:51pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I found out the reason our toilet paper has been disappearing so fast recently isn't because my son is wanking like a gibbon as I first thought. He's just been using our shredder to make streamers out of the stuff, then hiding it all in a box in his closet. Fucking hell, son. FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2014 at 10:04am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, while I was making dinner, my husband argued that our new dog has intelligence issues, and we should give him away. I angrily defended the poor thing, and had almost won, until the dog walked over and licked the inside of the hot oven door. FML

by Anonymous / 04/30/2014 at 1:17am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, I took my kids to an Easter party hosted by a local church. The nice lady in charge told the kids, "Jesus died, but He rose to life again!" My 9 year old screamed, "LIKE A ZOMBIE!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2014 at 8:14pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, I was feeling horny, so I told my boyfriend, who lives 30 minutes away, that "I really needed him". He replied, "Did you fall in the toilet again?" FML

by that girl / 04/08/2014 at 7:06pm / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I don't like her Facebook statuses enough. FML

by AlonsoKold / 04/07/2014 at 7:39pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, after cleaning my house because I'd thrown a party all weekend while my parents were gone, I still got caught because somebody tried to make beer popsicles with Q-Tips in the ice trays in my freezer. FML

by trp007 / 04/06/2014 at 11:03pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I resorted to the oldest prank in the book: laxatives in the food. Except it wasn't for a prank, but just a desperate attempt to get my clingy boyfriend to leave me the hell alone. I think I'm going to hell. FML

by someone / 04/01/2014 at 3:21pm / United States (West Virginia) / Love

Today, my neighbor yelled at me because, according to him, the sound of me scraping the ice off my windshield wakes him up every morning. This is the same neighbor who ran over my mailbox last week because there was too much snow on his windows to see properly. FML

by IcyWindows / 03/31/2014 at 10:03pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous