LolliDolly

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Offline (the 12/07/2016 at 1:59am)

LolliDolly

5Fucked!

LolliDollyLolliDolly
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 May 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6853
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About LolliDolly : Hi, I'm Noelia or Ellie. Looking for laughs but I just end up feeling very sympathetic a lot of the time.

Cosmetology student. 19 years old. Awful sense of humor and bad puns.

LolliDolly's page activity

Visits<b>Captobvious19</b> - the 11/27/2016 at 6:37pm<b>iamscott</b> - the 11/16/2016 at 12:54pm<b>webmdbag</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 12:31am<b>sandman676</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 3:07am<b>mbdresnick</b> - the 09/10/2016 at 11:58am<b>chewsef</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 7:35pm<b>misspeach13</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 3:29am<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 07/09/2016 at 10:25pm<b>Taymoo1515</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 3:53am<b>399</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 9:40pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 11:44am<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 6:09pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 1:35am<b>dno79</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 4:32pm<b>nioclas_hav</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 2:28pm<b>pred8885</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 12:37pm<b>TC2Flee</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 11:58pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 9:19pm

Fucked!<b>sandman676</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 9:07am<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 7:35am<b>JadeOmega</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 5:27pm<b>owlhead1</b> - the 04/02/2016 at 6:52am<b>incoherentrmblr</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 7:23pm

LolliDolly's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of LolliDolly's badges

LolliDolly's favorite FMLs

Today, at the Mommy and Me dance class that I take my four year old daughter to, the instructor had us do a stretch, telling us to pretend we're mermaids. My daughter said to me, "But you're not a mermaid, you're a whale!" FML

by Abby_gummibear / 03/19/2011 at 5:04pm / United States (Nevada) / Kids

Today, I went on a date, the first one I've been on since my last boyfriend broke up with me 6 months ago. We were in a restaurant, and at the end of meal he insisted on paying the bill. He wanted to leave a 15% tip but couldn't work out in his head how much to leave. The bill was for £100. FML

by Anonymous / 03/16/2011 at 1:20pm / United Kingdom (London) / Money

Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML

by Almostfunny / 03/16/2011 at 9:01am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, an old lady hit me with her car. After which she says, "Oh! Not Again!" FML

by roadkill / 02/28/2011 at 10:50am / United States / Transportation

Today, I was going down on my girlfriend. I thought everything was going well, then all of a sudden she gets up and screams at me "IT'S NOT A TACO EATING COMPETITION, CHILL OUT." FML

by failed / 02/23/2011 at 5:06am / Switzerland (Vaud) / Intimacy

Today, I just pulled out of the fast food drive through, only to pull right behind a septic truck. Just as I was about to dig into my food, I noticed it had a handy window about a foot round. I had a stare-down with a turd until I could pass. FML

by Goatbeard / 02/15/2011 at 12:13pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

by bride / 02/14/2011 at 1:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. We are both virgins. After we kissed and I took down my pants, she screamed and said "That THING is going to break me." We never did it. FML

by Anonymous / 01/16/2011 at 8:28pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I realized I've been playing too much Call of Duty. I started screaming, "Spawn, bitch! Spawn!" at my microwavable pizza while it was in the microwave. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 12:55pm / United States (Florida) / Geek

Today, at an Aunt's wake, my five year old son walked up to the coffin, and, with the whole family around him, exclaimed, "Well that's good, I was wondering where she's been." FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2010 at 4:31am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2010 at 9:20am / Spain (Asturias) / Intimacy

Today, the guy I like recommended I buy this computer game. Wanting to impress him, I agreed. Turns out it was a joke. I am now the proud owner of Microsoft Train Simulator 2005, and he can't stop laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2010 at 4:14am / United Kingdom (London) / Love

Today, I finally decided to do regular biology rather than honors biology, thinking honors would be too hard. My first day in regular biology, my lab partner asked me whether a rock was alive or not. FML

by shelbs61 / 08/30/2010 at 3:55pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while I was at my boyfriend's house, I got my period. About an hour after I tell him I just got my period, he impatiently says "Is it over yet?" FML

by MandMandM / 07/19/2010 at 2:38am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, the Vuvuzela that my brother ordered online was delivered to our house. FML

by anonymous / 06/21/2010 at 8:21am / Kids