Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Llama_Face89

Online | Search for a member

Llama_Face89

4Liked!

Llama_Face89Llama_Face89
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 19 April 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3095
  • Number of comments : 1095
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About Llama_Face89 : KISS ME I'M IRISH!
Let's see.. My names Liam. Canadian and proud to be so!

Diehard Montreal Canadiens fan since I was a child and living just north of Boston. Makes hockey season interesting. >:)

Nos bras meurtris vous tendent le flambeau, à vous toujours de le porter bien haut.

Anything else I suppose you'll have to ask.

Also a giant nerd. Yea, I roll dice. Problem?

My Nissan will wreck your Honda.

Llama_Face89's page activity

Visits<b>leaper66</b> - 2 hours ago<b>LSPadvtime</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 7:39pm<b>imnat</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 8:05pm<b>TheOnlyMizLiv</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 1:28pm<b>Andr913</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 9:49am<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 6:37am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 10/07/2014 at 8:20am<b>chiefsmalls</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:44pm<b>xxxxnikkix</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 5:23pm<b>kissmeImawkward</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 12:42pm<b>67_mustang_coupe</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 6:58am<b>suckmideck</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 12:50pm<b>ImTheAlpha</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 4:21pm<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 5:40pm<b>monstersinmee</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 8:10pm<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 4:07am<b>dzhonatan</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 10:13pm<b>islandstyle808</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 12:42pm

Liked!<b>leaper66</b> - just now<b>sarah5745</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 8:43pm<b>DewIchigo</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 5:23am<b>kissmeImawkward</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 1:31pm

Llama_Face89's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of Llama_Face89's badges

Llama_Face89's favorite FMLs

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50621) - you deserved it (6626)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, some pig slapped my ass as he passed me in the street, then looked back at me with a dirty grin. His grin turned to horror when he realized that I'm actually a guy, then to anger as he bitched me out for "tricking" him by "looking like a chick". FML

#21167190
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56736) - you deserved it (6840)

On 06/08/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by 404: sense not found (man) - United States (California)

Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML

#21165062
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42661) - you deserved it (6213)

On 06/06/2014 at 3:00pm - work - by confusing (man) - Zimbabwe

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML

#21158688
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46677) - you deserved it (5188)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:53pm - animals - by disturbed - Ireland

Today, my cat decided to hide in the garbage can so he could get a free trip outside, but was too fat to climb all of the way inside of it. He got stuck half-way in. It took me ten minutes to get him out. FML

Today, I finally brought a girl home from college. While I was making her some coffee, my roommate came down in her underwear, pretended to be my girlfriend, and asked if we were having a threesome. My date left before I could explain, and my roommate thinks it's fucking hilarious. FML

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

#21116703
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41566) - you deserved it (6654)

On 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm - work - by Anonymous - Norway (Nordland)

Today, my neighbor called the police for the seventh time because he's convinced I'm a vampire. He's also gotten in the habit of leaving garlic cloves in my yard. My parents come next week. FML

#21095586
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37178) - you deserved it (2848)

On 03/24/2014 at 9:52pm - misc - by Vampprobs - United States (Michigan)

Today, my dad decided to shave his beard. I told him I wanted him to keep it, so he took the shavings, put them in a jar, and left it in my room. FML

#21093737
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34503) - you deserved it (11936)

On 03/22/2014 at 7:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after finishing an essay at the library, I fell asleep and had a dream about the essay crawling out through my laptop screen and trying to kill me. I woke by the librarian shaking me and telling me to stop screaming. I was mortified. FML

#21091737
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38185) - you deserved it (4314)

On 03/20/2014 at 12:48pm - work - by systematicpanic (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, I was texting an artist friend telling her I wanted to buy her paintings; going on and on about how much I wanted it and loved the way they looked and couldn't wait to have them. I realized my phone had corrected paintings to panties. FML

#21091119
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37318) - you deserved it (4952)

On 03/19/2014 at 7:19pm - misc - by BigBlue (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was waiting at the bus stop and noticed a girl that I played netball with. I ran across the road to meet her and she ran across the car park to meet me. We hugged and looked at each other slowly backing away as we both realised that we didn't know each other. FML

#21083446
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46172) - you deserved it (6773)

On 03/10/2014 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my son set up a telescope in the attic not so he could study astronomy like he told me, but so he could spy on the girl across the street. FML

#21070645
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34788) - you deserved it (6572)

On 02/24/2014 at 7:51pm - kids - by sonwhy - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: