Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Lizza330

Online | Search for a member

Lizza330

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 30 March 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8534
  • Number of comments : 167
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Lizza330 : Hi

Lizza330's page activity

Visits<b>wkat17</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 1:18pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 5:20am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 8:33pm<b>raven83</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 12:30pm<b>pugpuggy</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 4:46pm<b>elizabeth_black</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 10:34pm<b>invadermaythe1st</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 9:46am<b>thelaughinator</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 8:53pm<b>Marine6297</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 10:42pm<b>Caninefreak</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 12:27am<b>Tezoma</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 4:53pm<b>Amy_Nguyen_12</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 12:13am<b>Gift_of_humor</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 9:26am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 6:44am<b>LiveLifeAllDay</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 10:45am<b>hard_candy</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 8:44am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 7:46am<b>gurbism</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 3:13pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 5:26am

Lizza330's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of Lizza330's badges

Lizza330's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date with my boyfriend. Suddenly he starts speaking gibberish. I ask what's wrong? He says, "I was just talking to my unicorn. He says you're pretty," and winks at me. What have we learned today? The person I like is a freak, and apparently unicorns are real. FML

#2829311
396 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62827) - you deserved it (12257)

On 06/12/2009 at 12:49pm - love - by unicorn (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I thought it would be funny to bother my friend Emily. I kept punching her. She asked if I wanted to fight. I agreed because she's a 15 year old skinny girl and I'm 17 year old buff guy. She beat the crap out of me until I cried. FML

#2234853
433 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19775) - you deserved it (148435)

On 05/24/2009 at 5:49am - misc - by AyoitsSteveo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I thought it would be funny to bother my friend Emily. I kept punching her. She asked if I wanted to fight. I agreed because she's a 15 year old skinny girl and I'm 17 year old buff guy. She beat the crap out of me until I cried. FML

#2234853
433 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19775) - you deserved it (148435)

On 05/24/2009 at 5:49am - misc - by AyoitsSteveo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had my high school reunion. The nerdy guy that I picked on all 4 years had married a Swedish supermodel, then divorced her for a Brazilian supermodel. My girlfriend works at 7-11. Karma sucks. FML

#2019724
656 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28108) - you deserved it (284306)

On 05/17/2009 at 4:16pm - misc - by karmasabitch (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a cute boy told me I looked like a celebrity. Flattered, I asked who I resembled. He responded by saying that I looked exactly like Ugly Betty. He was serious. FML

#973990
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54666) - you deserved it (5132)

On 04/14/2009 at 4:41pm - misc - by wishbone - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got back my math test. Instead of taking the time to mark the mistakes, my professor just circled the bottom half of the page and wrote "OMG." FML

#853708
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92426) - you deserved it (27567)

On 04/07/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by aviators (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went on a date with this girl I met online. The conversation drifted and we were talking about how we'd prefer to die, if we had a choice. I said, "I want to skydive over the ocean without a parachute." She said she wants to be made into a wallet. FML

#849037
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58121) - you deserved it (9252)

On 04/07/2009 at 3:08am - love - by no_leather_of_any_kind - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went on a date with this girl I met online. The conversation drifted and we were talking about how we'd prefer to die, if we had a choice. I said, "I want to skydive over the ocean without a parachute." She said she wants to be made into a wallet. FML

#849037
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58121) - you deserved it (9252)

On 04/07/2009 at 3:08am - love - by no_leather_of_any_kind - United States (Oregon)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
530 comments

I agree, your life sucks (250499) - you deserved it (32416)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend was driving me to her house against my will when I said, "Sometimes it's annoying that you always decide where we go because you drive." She replied, "Yeah, I wish I could be more of the girl in this relationship." FML

#482680
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12603) - you deserved it (76879)

On 03/20/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by lukey_G (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend was driving me to her house against my will when I said, "Sometimes it's annoying that you always decide where we go because you drive." She replied, "Yeah, I wish I could be more of the girl in this relationship." FML

#482680
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12603) - you deserved it (76879)

On 03/20/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by lukey_G (man) - United States (California)

Today, my family and I were at a restaurant. We're Swedish and love talking about people in our language because no one ever understands here. I decided to comment about how ugly the girl at the next table was. She turned around and goes "Dra åt helvete." That's Swedish for "Go to hell." FML

#329882
455 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29222) - you deserved it (303502)

On 03/14/2009 at 9:30pm - misc - by SwedishBozo (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was woken up by my roommates cat meowing so loudly at her door, wanting in. Suddenly it stopped. I was just falling back into sleep when I rolled over and the cat was right there beside my head. Meowing. FML

#3778
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17856) - you deserved it (2486)

On 01/30/2009 at 1:18pm - animals - by Noname - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was teaching a class but kids were chatting. After 3 soap box speeches about "The next person who talks gets a note to take home," one kid looked right at me and went "meow". FML

#891
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23755) - you deserved it (7019)

On 01/09/2009 at 3:54am - kids - by Liz - Sent from mobile version

Today, well, last night, I told my girlfriend that I'm a light sleeper, and that the slightest disturbance will wake me up. As a result, this morning when I looked in the mirror I noticed a bunch of stuff written all over my body, like "You see, you didn't wake up!", "Nor now!". FML

#703
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7601) - you deserved it (28098)

On 01/04/2009 at 10:33pm - love - by titou - Sent from mobile version



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: