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Lizza330

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Lizza330
  • Town/Country : Narnia, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3748
  • Number of comments : 165
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Lizza330 : Hi

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Lizza330's favorite FMLs

Today, my cell phone was stolen. I work in a morgue. By myself. Obviously it wasn't stolen by any of those people. FML

#4154850
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36590) - you deserved it (3679)

On 07/30/2009 at 4:58am - misc - by emily (woman) - United States (New York) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I was at the gym running with intensity on the treadmill. As I was working out, I noticed a few guys behind me staring at me. I figured they were checking me out because I was losing some weight and looking better. Turns out they were betting on how much longer "Fat Ass" could last. FML

#3912171
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44323) - you deserved it (5531)

On 07/20/2009 at 7:31pm - misc - by fatgirl4 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I moved in with my brother to save on a swanky apartment. I was skeptical as to how this would work out as we fought a lot as kids. Our first big fight? Whether or not to keep his dorm-style futon complete with Return of the Jedi sheets. He's a 35-yr old physician; I'm a 28-yr old lawyer. FML

#3669559
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32024) - you deserved it (9499)

On 07/11/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by bdiddy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom went to a psychic. The reason? She has convinced herself that I'm gay, even though I've told her that I'm not and never have been. The psychic disagreed. Apparently, I'm bicurious with one of my guy friends. Guess who my mom believes? FML

#3137659
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48912) - you deserved it (2938)

On 06/23/2009 at 1:28am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I decided to use fake tan, seeing as I am so pale. Everywhere I have been today, I have had children behind me. Singing the Oompa Loompa song. FML

#2991073
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12302) - you deserved it (54191)

On 06/18/2009 at 9:32am - misc - by OompaLoompa (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a date with my boyfriend. Suddenly he starts speaking gibberish. I ask what's wrong? He says, "I was just talking to my unicorn. He says you're pretty," and winks at me. What have we learned today? The person I like is a freak, and apparently unicorns are real. FML

#2829311
397 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56079) - you deserved it (10645)

On 06/12/2009 at 12:49pm - love - by unicorn (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I thought it would be funny to bother my friend Emily. I kept punching her. She asked if I wanted to fight. I agreed because she's a 15 year old skinny girl and I'm 17 year old buff guy. She beat the crap out of me until I cried. FML

#2234853
419 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13678) - you deserved it (110330)

On 05/24/2009 at 5:49am - misc - by AyoitsSteveo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I thought it would be funny to bother my friend Emily. I kept punching her. She asked if I wanted to fight. I agreed because she's a 15 year old skinny girl and I'm 17 year old buff guy. She beat the crap out of me until I cried. FML

#2234853
419 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13678) - you deserved it (110330)

On 05/24/2009 at 5:49am - misc - by AyoitsSteveo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had my high school reunion. The nerdy guy that I picked on all 4 years had married a Swedish supermodel, then divorced her for a Brazilian supermodel. My girlfriend works at 7-11. Karma sucks. FML

#2019724
626 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22016) - you deserved it (253220)

On 05/17/2009 at 4:16pm - misc - by karmasabitch (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a cute boy told me I looked like a celebrity. Flattered, I asked who I resembled. He responded by saying that I looked exactly like Ugly Betty. He was serious. FML

#973990
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52085) - you deserved it (4834)

On 04/14/2009 at 4:41pm - misc - by wishbone - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got back my math test. Instead of taking the time to mark the mistakes, my professor just circled the bottom half of the page and wrote "OMG." FML

#853708
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87995) - you deserved it (26170)

On 04/07/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by aviators (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went on a date with this girl I met online. The conversation drifted and we were talking about how we'd prefer to die, if we had a choice. I said, "I want to skydive over the ocean without a parachute." She said she wants to be made into a wallet. FML

#849037
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53501) - you deserved it (8645)

On 04/07/2009 at 3:08am - love - by no_leather_of_any_kind - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went on a date with this girl I met online. The conversation drifted and we were talking about how we'd prefer to die, if we had a choice. I said, "I want to skydive over the ocean without a parachute." She said she wants to be made into a wallet. FML

#849037
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53501) - you deserved it (8645)

On 04/07/2009 at 3:08am - love - by no_leather_of_any_kind - United States (Oregon)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
515 comments

I agree, your life sucks (227072) - you deserved it (29232)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend was driving me to her house against my will when I said, "Sometimes it's annoying that you always decide where we go because you drive." She replied, "Yeah, I wish I could be more of the girl in this relationship." FML

#482680
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10853) - you deserved it (73069)

On 03/20/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by lukey_G (man) - United States (California)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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Thursday 10 April 2014

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