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LizetteBerenice

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LizetteBerenice

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LizetteBereniceLizetteBerenice
  • Town/Country : Arc, France
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 29 July 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3451
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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LizetteBerenice's page activity

Visits<b>Fidge</b> - 26 minutes ago<b>maters62</b> - one hour ago<b>Qele</b> - 2 hours ago<b>khoov19</b> - 2 hours ago<b>pantherfan0877</b> - 2 hours ago<b>last_kings84</b> - 2 hours ago<b>twoply</b> - 3 hours ago<b>Edogg215</b> - 3 hours ago<b>zjay</b> - 4 hours ago<b>Coachjoost79</b> - 5 hours ago<b>Dodge4x4Ram</b> - 5 hours ago<b>xxjohndoexx9</b> - 6 hours ago<b>Wicked_evie</b> - 6 hours ago<b>dudeguy1989</b> - 6 hours ago<b>Railworker12</b> - 6 hours ago<b>GhastlyLeek</b> - 7 hours ago<b>whoopydoodah</b> - 15 hours ago<b>oldladytaco</b> - 20 hours ago

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LizetteBerenice's favorite FMLs

Today, my son got in serious trouble after he was caught trying to sell weed to people in the street. The good news is that the "weed" was just actual weeds he'd pulled from our lawn. The bad news is that at age 16, my son is too stupid to know the difference. FML

#21158441
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52635) - you deserved it (7397)

On 05/31/2014 at 5:30pm - kids - by idiot says "you raised him" (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML

#21158120
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45127) - you deserved it (8470)

On 05/31/2014 at 11:05am - love - by wendtinmypants (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML

#21152151
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47819) - you deserved it (6596)

On 05/26/2014 at 11:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

#21151127
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47586) - you deserved it (7231)

On 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm - misc - by great 1st impression (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I told my 4-year-old neighbor that I'm pregnant. His response was to attack me with a stick "for swallowing a baby." Three people had to pull him off. FML

#21145558
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45902) - you deserved it (5297)

On 05/19/2014 at 8:00pm - kids - by Baby eater - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had a wonderful dream where I got married to the perfect guy, then had the best sex of my life on a beautiful honeymoon. The only problem is that my "husband" was the snowman from Frozen, and that I got sad when I realized it was just a dream. FML

#21142020
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42660) - you deserved it (9099)

On 05/16/2014 at 5:07pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

#21140956
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35198) - you deserved it (55442)

On 05/15/2014 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by FLIPmcCOOL - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I took a pregnancy test because I'd missed a few periods, gained weight, and been moody. Turns out I'm just fat and moody. FML

#21139495
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46870) - you deserved it (10640)

On 05/14/2014 at 9:12am - health - by thanks4support - United States (Ohio)

Today, I flexed so hard for a selfie, I gave myself a hernia. FML

#21138987
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23090) - you deserved it (66333)

On 05/13/2014 at 7:46pm - health - by ShutTheFuCupcake (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my girlfriend admitted to my best friend that she basically just sees me as a dildo with annoying emotions. FML

#21138864
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53034) - you deserved it (7153)

On 05/13/2014 at 5:31pm - love - by taintedlover (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, while driving out to the countryside with my new boyfriend, we came across a deer lying in the road. It seemed badly hurt, but instead of letting me get out and make sure, my boyfriend decided to just run over its head to finish it off, then continued driving with a smirk on his face. FML

#21138836
402 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54248) - you deserved it (8587)

On 05/13/2014 at 5:02pm - animals - by dating a big bag of dicks (woman) - United States

Today, my husband and I put our children to bed a little earlier than usual, so we could have some sexy time. Immediately following my full-blown orgasm, I rolled over, only to see my wide-eyed son peeking over the top of the mattress. FML

#21133668
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61775) - you deserved it (14182)

On 05/07/2014 at 10:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, a bird got into the walls of my house through a hole. I located where it was by following the chirping and scratching sounds, and drilled a hole to get it out. I pulled out the drill, only to find the drill bit bloody. Suddenly, no more chirps. FML

#21131587
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50244) - you deserved it (16880)

On 05/05/2014 at 5:03pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, the only thing I got for my birthday was my boyfriend's offer to give me "the gift of anal". FML

#21127339
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39597) - you deserved it (4988)

On 04/30/2014 at 5:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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