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LittleSam3's favorite FMLs
Today, I sold yet another £100 bottle of lotion to a stuck-up teenage fashionista with less brain-power than the yapping bastard of a dog she carried in her arms. She did nothing but brag the whole time about her jewelry, and openly mocked me for only making minimum wage. FML
by fucking pissants / 07/13/2012 at 3:08pm / United Kingdom / Work
by etmerda / 07/12/2012 at 6:31am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, while I was walking home alone, a homeless man approached me and took me by the hand. Apparently, he's been watching me for weeks and has fallen madly in love with me. He told me not to worry, though; he's not a rapist. FML
by Anonymous / 07/10/2012 at 12:43pm / Canada / Miscellaneous
Today, I was listening to some Michael Jackson through my earphones when I saw this really cute girl. Trying to impress, I aproached her while doing some dance moves, not thinking about how unbelievably stupid it must have looked without the music. FML
by Anonymous / 07/09/2012 at 6:37am / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Miscellaneous
by Dammit / 07/07/2012 at 12:45am / United States (California) / Health
by Anonymous / 07/05/2012 at 3:10pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by say my name / 06/30/2012 at 9:35pm / Intimacy
by ohbiebjetaime / 06/30/2012 at 4:09pm / France / Love
Today, I was assigned to work on a huge project with Michael. Michael refers to himself in the third person, constantly mumbles unintelligibly to himself, doesn't smile, laugh or make eye contact, and refuses to address me directly. I'll be stuck with him for about four months. FML
by NoMagicMike / 06/27/2012 at 12:53pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work
by tammy / 06/27/2012 at 1:05am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I went to the bookstore and saw a stunning girl reading. I walked over and picked up a book, thinking our two books were the same category, hence a good conversation starter. She looked at me, and I pointed at my book and smiled. After that, she left. It was a sex position book. FML
by deli Shoppe / 06/27/2012 at 12:39am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I realized that the only times I get to hang out with my friends outside of school are when one of them accidentally mentions plans in front of me and they are obligated by social protocol to invite me. FML
by Anonymous / 06/19/2012 at 4:59pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Miscellaneous
Today, a little girl walked up to me at Target and asked me what my name was. I smiled and told her my name was Kristen. She looked at the skirt I was wearing and said, "Kristen, can you wear pants tomorrow?" FML
by whattdafuuukkkk / 06/05/2012 at 7:56am / United States / Work
by nanall / 06/04/2012 at 3:19am / United States / Kids
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…