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LittleBastard

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LittleBastard

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LittleBastardLittleBastard
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 8 July 1944 (70 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 503
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About LittleBastard : I'm confused as of why we need to have so many luxuries in life, like this smartphone I'm using to write this to you, even though this section is to tell you about myself, I'd rather write nonsense to the unsuspecting viewer of my profile.

LittleBastard's page activity

Visits<b>ohjoy15</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 12:20am<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 9:20pm<b>IsjnI</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 2:47pm<b>evilamoebaattack</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 1:06pm<b>commanderstiff</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 7:11pm<b>Kristen320</b> - the 12/05/2014 at 1:56am<b>mk1hate1my1job1</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 10:05am<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 8:11am<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 12:55am<b>cherrio27</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 5:17pm<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 10/12/2014 at 12:37am<b>supernerd95</b> - the 10/09/2014 at 3:20pm<b>okibi1</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 4:43pm<b>devildog562</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 10:36pm<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 1:32am<b>Kbuk13jfkdm</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 10:40pm<b>Mad_Or_Nah</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 6:30pm<b>uninfluenced</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 11:43pm

Liked!<b>okibi1</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:43pm

LittleBastard's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Perfectionist

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See all of LittleBastard's badges

LittleBastard's favorite FMLs

Today, half of my motivation to stop drinking is so that my tolerance will go down, because I currently can't actually afford enough alcohol to get even tipsy anymore. FML

#21319263
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22969) - you deserved it (9372)

On 12/17/2014 at 5:41pm - health - by Recovering Alcoholic - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I took a crap. When I stood up to admire my handiwork and flush, I noticed blood-red everywhere in the toilet. I freaked out like a little girl, thinking I was bleeding out of my ass. Then I noticed the ketchup packets my roommate had slipped under the seat to prank me. FML

#21319149
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26560) - you deserved it (5125)

On 12/17/2014 at 1:47pm - misc - by RIP Turd (peacebeuponit) (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, I sat on the bus for 3 hours stuck in traffic trying to ignore the old lady sitting next to me discreetly masturbating. FML

Today, I watched from my office window as a couple maneuvered their car to squash a dead pigeon flat on the road. I then watched as they got out of the car, set up tripods and started taking photos of it. FML

Today, I got on one knee in front of my girlfriend. I pulled out the ring, uttered the words "Lisa, will you..." then abruptly shat my pants. FML

#21271177
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42572) - you deserved it (5136)

On 10/05/2014 at 11:47am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I overheard my brother telling his friend that having sex with a girl who's on the pill gives the guy female hormones and "turns you into like, half-chick, half-dude." He was serious. How am I related to this moron? FML

#21270200
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33173) - you deserved it (2443)

On 10/03/2014 at 4:43pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I asked a passenger what he wanted to drink. When he said marijuana, I started making pot jokes. He really asked for mineral water. I was given a drug test when we landed. FML

#21269829
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29858) - you deserved it (10288)

On 10/02/2014 at 9:55pm - work - by stewardess - United States (Texas)

Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to bend my iPhone 6 like there's no tomorrow. FML

#21268378
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39406) - you deserved it (13327)

On 09/30/2014 at 2:48pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my hand was stung by a wasp. It has resulted in all my fingers being swollen and therefore much bigger than usual. I'm getting married tomorrow and there's no way I can get the ring on my finger. FML

#21268375
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39440) - you deserved it (2717)

On 09/30/2014 at 2:46pm - health - by Tampax - Spain (Castilla-La Mancha)

Today, my girlfriend visited my restaurant with some guy I'd never seen before. She introduced him to me as her "new boyfriend". She was always a cold bitch, but I never saw this coming. I had to serve their food while choking back tears, and I couldn't work up the nerve to spit in it. FML

#21260464
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49599) - you deserved it (4724)

On 09/18/2014 at 3:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, two children decided it would be fun to try to ding-dong-ditch me. I never answered the door as I saw them running away. They did it a couple of times before getting bored. That's when they decided it would be fun to come into my house instead. FML

#21240389
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40890) - you deserved it (4574)

On 08/18/2014 at 8:10am - kids - by I hate children - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, my coworkers and I were comparing the backgrounds we have on our phones. They pretty much sum up our love lives; everyone else's background is a photo of their boyfriend or girlfriend. Mine's a photo of a lifeless desert. FML

#21235038
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36283) - you deserved it (4455) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/11/2014 at 3:05pm - love - by Fennec (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, after working the night shift, I accidentally left my iPod at the office. I woke up later and went on Facebook. To my dismay, I saw some coworker had posted stuff on my wall, such as, "I really have to take a shit!" and "Yes, my tits are real!" FML

#21192976
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39360) - you deserved it (10599)

On 06/29/2014 at 9:25pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, some alarm, somewhere in my house, is making a low battery noise. I've checked every smoke detector multiple times, and I can't find it. It has been hours. I'm not sure if its still doing it or if the sound has just invaded my brain. FML

Today, my mom brought her sleazy boyfriend home. He took one look at me, swatted my ass, and said, "It runs in the family." My mom just laughed and winked at me, and mouthed, "He's a keeper!" FML

#21103666
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56815) - you deserved it (3937)

On 04/03/2014 at 1:22pm - love - by wiona (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



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