About Lisimal : Hell to the O!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, my dad told me he had been seeing someone for a while and has decided to marry her. When I met her, her son looked familiar. I lost my virginity to him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36706) - you deserved it (4114)
On 01/04/2011 at 5:56am - intimacy - by LoveMyNewBro -
Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20413) - you deserved it (7777)
On 12/28/2010 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)
Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20413) - you deserved it (7777)
On 12/28/2010 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)
Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20413) - you deserved it (7777)
On 12/28/2010 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)
Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34363) - you deserved it (6992)
On 12/25/2010 at 8:38am - intimacy - by Jessie - United States (Texas)
Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33414) - you deserved it (2638)
On 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33414) - you deserved it (2638)
On 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I participated in a charity auction at my university where the boys are "sold" to the highest bidder to be a slave for a day. My girlfriend and ex were bidding against each other. My ex won. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27123) - you deserved it (3909)
On 12/09/2010 at 2:58pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)
Today, my wonderful boyfriend asked me if I wanted him to cook me scrambled eggs with sausage for breakfast. When I said yes, he pulled out his junk, and started shaking it violently in my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27880) - you deserved it (7644)
On 12/02/2010 at 10:54am - intimacy - by sissydlk (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he started shaking really hard. When I asked him what he was doing, he simply said "I want to be better than your vibrator!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25971) - you deserved it (9532)
On 11/24/2010 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Heyy - United States (Washington)
Today, I was taking off my underwear to change into fresh clothes. Pulling them down, I realize there's a big fat spider in them. Not only did I have a spider chilling with my genitals the whole day, but I'm deathly afraid of them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27933) - you deserved it (3533)
Today, I was walking with and hugging my girlfriend at the same time. I tried to be funny and touched her breast, saying "Boob" in a silly voice. In reply, she slapped me in the crotch, saying "Dick" in the same voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6813) - you deserved it (45213)
On 11/21/2010 at 3:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico (Morelos)
Today, someone in my class wrote "Erase me if you can!" at the very top of the board, as I am always tormented about how short I am compared to everyone else. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't reach it. I'm the teacher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36835) - you deserved it (4362)
On 11/12/2010 at 1:23pm - misc - by Petitprof (man) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)
Today, while at dinner, I told my boyfriend that I wished he liked sushi. He replied, 'I wish you liked anal.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (15862) - you deserved it (27881)
On 11/12/2010 at 11:31am - intimacy - by lisacasabonita (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16469) - you deserved it (46590)
On 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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