Lisimal

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Offline (the 08/03/2015 at 7:27am)

Lisimal

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 26001
  • Number of comments : 207
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Lisimal :

Lisimal's page activity

Visits<b>skippydoda</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 7:34am<b>ScratchCatPower</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 6:18pm<b>melons</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 9:24am<b>xygen</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 7:03am<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 10:27am<b>moneylessrc</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 6:25pm<b>Bradley_Dillon</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 2:39pm<b>CryoShock</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 10:55pm<b>XmasaX</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 8:39am<b>killuhand</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 12:52pm<b>CloudBustah</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 8:48am<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 5:14pm<b>Flendre_scarlet</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:12am<b>singer0421</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 11:27pm<b>kubackster</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 10:59am<b>fay313</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 11:27pm<b>cookycoconut</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 9:10pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 1:27pm

Lisimal's FML badges

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Checking you out

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Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of Lisimal's badges

Lisimal's favorite FMLs

Today, my cat thought it was appropriate to bring a bird into the house at 4am; the bird thought it was appropriate to attack my mom. FML

by 4am blues / 07/13/2015 at 12:39am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, my cat thought it was appropriate to bring a bird into the house at 4am; the bird thought it was appropriate to attack my mom. FML

by 4am blues / 07/13/2015 at 12:39am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML

by newmoongirl1036 / 07/12/2015 at 10:03pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, on my day off, I received a call from my boss asking why I wasn't at work yet. After getting dressed and an hour-long train ride later, I got there only to find out that it was an April Fool's prank. I had to take the train back home. FML

by IDontGetPaidEnoughForThisShit / 03/31/2015 at 10:15pm / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, a really drunk couple staggered into the store I work at. One of them yelled at me, "Hey you! Kid! Tell us where the booze is at!" This would have been funny if these people weren't my parents. FML

by DrunkParents / 03/31/2015 at 7:32pm / United States (Montana) / Work

Today, I was cleaning a pocketknife when I noticed a spider on my leg. My first reaction was to stab it. FML

by OuchImAMoron / 11/28/2013 at 9:05pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking dirty to my long-distance lover while touching myself, when a cockroach fell from my ceiling and landed on the hand I was molesting myself with. FML

by DisgustinglyFrustrated / 10/10/2013 at 11:40am / Argentina (Santa Fe) / Intimacy

Today, my dad told me he had been seeing someone for a while and has decided to marry her. When I met her, her son looked familiar. I lost my virginity to him. FML

by LoveMyNewBro / 01/04/2011 at 5:56am / Intimacy

Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML

by Anonymous / 12/28/2010 at 10:39am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Transportation

Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML

by Anonymous / 12/28/2010 at 10:39am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Transportation

Today, I was in a very crowded train coming home from work. I saw a cute guy sitting across from me. As I lifted my one leg to hook it over my other leg, I let out a loud fart. All I could do was sit there and wait for my stop. FML

by Anonymous / 12/28/2010 at 10:39am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML

by Jessie / 12/25/2010 at 8:38am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML

by Anonymous / 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML

by Anonymous / 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I participated in a charity auction at my university where the boys are "sold" to the highest bidder to be a slave for a day. My girlfriend and ex were bidding against each other. My ex won. FML

by Anonymous / 12/09/2010 at 2:58pm / United Kingdom (Leicestershire) / Love