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Lirie

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Lirie
  • Town/Country : , USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 29 July 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 2014
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Lirie : noooooo

Lirie's last visitors

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Lirie's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of Lirie's badges

Lirie's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandmother was driving me to the mall. Suddenly, she stopped in the middle of the road. When I asked her what exactly she was doing, she said, "Oh, am I driving?" FML

#19685712
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22219) - you deserved it (1575)

On 05/26/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by anonymus - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML

#19682982
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7860) - you deserved it (29334)

On 05/26/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by girly girly - United States (Texas)

Today, my friends switched my mom and my girlfriend's numbers in my phone. I sexted my mom. FML

#19682048
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29257) - you deserved it (8171)

On 05/26/2012 at 3:15am - intimacy - by ilovemymomma - United States (Texas)

Today, I joined a local interest website, hoping to make some friends in my area. I don't think I've ever met so many guys before who introduce themselves with pictures of their cocks. FML

#19678592
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14185) - you deserved it (3597)

On 05/25/2012 at 2:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got fired from my job at a weight-loss center because I was too skinny, and apparently it's too depressing for the customers to handle. FML

#19677400
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18820) - you deserved it (2333)

On 05/25/2012 at 7:18am - work - by jingle - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was choosing my soft drink at a restaurant. The kid in front of me was too short to reach the lids so I handed him one. His mom rushed over, pried it out of his hands, threw it away, and yelled, "She's filthy, don't use that." FML

Today, my mom watched a Dr. Phil episode. She's now hysterical because she assumes me and my friends are involved in sex parties. All because a man on the TV said so. FML

#19671635
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18489) - you deserved it (1530)

On 05/24/2012 at 6:44am - intimacy - by silencio - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was shopping with a friend. We snuck into the same fitting room so we could give our opinions on each other's clothes. The suspicious saleswoman knocked on the door and asked how many people were in our room. I quickly answered, "It's OK. She's just watching." FML

#19669022
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14630) - you deserved it (6440)

On 05/23/2012 at 6:50pm - misc - by Shopper (woman) - United States

Today, I was browsing the web on my boyfriend's laptop, when I idly clicked a bookmark. It turned out to be his private blog, where he most recently spoke in very creepy detail about his efforts to make me love him, remarking that, "Soon, I'll plant my seed in her breeding hips." FML

#19663287
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31909) - you deserved it (3783)

On 05/22/2012 at 4:49pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, it was my birthday, and I woke up to my dad telling me that we're going to Disneyland. Apparently, by "we" he meant him and my mom. They did, however, make a point to say "happy birthday" before they left. FML

#19648886
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27545) - you deserved it (1610)

On 05/19/2012 at 10:04pm - misc - by Schubey (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my daughter's bed broke. Trying to see the damage, I lay down on her floor to get a closer look. I saw mountains of condom boxes under there. Now I know why the bed broke. FML

#19646260
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34775) - you deserved it (4743)

On 05/19/2012 at 11:08am - intimacy - by maggierose171 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my daughter's bed broke. Trying to see the damage, I lay down on her floor to get a closer look. I saw mountains of condom boxes under there. Now I know why the bed broke. FML

#19646260
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34775) - you deserved it (4743)

On 05/19/2012 at 11:08am - intimacy - by maggierose171 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, before I went into surgery, the patient next to me just finished the same procedure I was going to get. As he woke up in the recovery area 10 feet away, I was getting my final prep before the operation. On my way into the operating room I was comforted by his screams of agonizing pain. FML

Today, the "My body is beautiful" t-shirt that my therapist gave me didn't fit. FML

#19644277
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24376) - you deserved it (5687)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:46pm - health - by msassy - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

#19644212
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19474) - you deserved it (1266)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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