Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Lirie

Search for a member

Lirie

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 29 July 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3866
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Lirie : noooooo

Lirie's page activity

Visits<b>Sacytrl</b> - the 09/28/2013 at 11:04am<b>Trollx</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 2:47pm<b>crackmore278</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 6:35pm<b>KevinFlynn</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 12:04am<b>LeonnJ</b> - the 05/28/2013 at 5:21pm<b>NotGabe</b> - the 05/27/2013 at 2:53am<b>KiddNYC1O</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 10:06pm<b>EvilPandaxD</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 6:53am<b>AnonForAReason</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 3:24pm<b>WolfieTheBadass</b> - the 03/12/2013 at 2:49am<b>animalover9</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 8:45pm<b>samcro3</b> - the 03/03/2013 at 8:57am<b>zombieslayer83</b> - the 02/26/2013 at 4:51pm<b>kansah</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 3:20pm<b>guitarst1071995</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 12:43pm

Lirie's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of Lirie's badges

Lirie's favorite FMLs

Today, I had my driver's test in rural Maine. I hit a cow. FML

#20777070
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46796) - you deserved it (13181)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my boyfriend convinced me do an Insanity workout with him. I passed out during the warmup. FML

#20776146
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45071) - you deserved it (11602)

On 07/11/2013 at 3:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, as part of my veterinary degree, I had to demonstrate how to jerk off a dog in front of my entire class. Afterwards, the lecturer said that I have the 'magic touch'. FML

#20775868
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57694) - you deserved it (6816)

On 07/11/2013 at 11:18am - work - by vet1 (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML

#20775827
337 comments

I agree, your life sucks (98123) - you deserved it (11362)

On 07/11/2013 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I came home at 1am to find my mom sitting on my couch, ranting about how I'm not supposed to stay up this late. I'm 26 and I don't know how she got into my house. FML

#20775513
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58525) - you deserved it (3631)

On 07/11/2013 at 2:26am - misc - by whowhat (man) - United States

Today, a coworker complimented me on losing weight, and said that she wished she could drop a few pounds too. I was too embarrassed to tell her that the only reason I've lost weight is because I haven't been able to afford to eat. FML

#20775505
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55594) - you deserved it (3488)

On 07/11/2013 at 2:20am - work - by shouldbehappyiguess (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my college English teacher told me if I wanted an explanation for my grade I would have to schedule a conference to come to her office. It's an online class. I took an online class because I can't come in. FML

#20774966
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39363) - you deserved it (3884)

On 07/10/2013 at 8:15pm - work - by myl1f3isfuct (woman) - United States

Today, working my job, I had to explain to a kid that Pokemon is owned by Nintendo and they don't make it for the Xbox. Upset by this, he took hold of my leg and started biting. I'm also suspended, because his mother complained when I kicked him off me. FML

#20771337
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47975) - you deserved it (3152)

On 07/08/2013 at 10:08pm - work - by Garchomp (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I had a dream about marrying Hitler. I've had this same dream three times now. My subconscious is starting to scare me. FML

#20766565
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45579) - you deserved it (4705)

On 07/06/2013 at 3:11am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was chatting online with several relatives, discussing our family reunion. Bored out of my mind, I clicked to rename the conversation to "Boring shit with almost dead people." I didn't know it'd rename it for everyone. FML

Today, my crush kissed me for the first time. However, my hair was falling into my face and getting in the way. No problem, I wear a wig so without thinking, I simply removed it. I don't think he'll kiss me again anytime soon. FML

#20755685
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47345) - you deserved it (18252)

On 06/30/2013 at 6:58am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while running, a man ran up next to me and started jogging with me. He asked if he could run with me and I said yes. Later, when I told him I was going home, he followed me home. When I asked him to leave, he say down on my lawn in protest. He has been there for over 4 hours. FML

#20738304
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51172) - you deserved it (7725)

On 06/21/2013 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I attempted to ask a girl out by doing a flash mob and singing for her in the store where she works. Turns out, she suffers from anxiety and the overwhelming amount of attention caused a panic attack. No, I didn't get a date. FML

#20733111
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47413) - you deserved it (19342)

On 06/18/2013 at 11:02am - love - by Well, crap (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)

Today, I turned 29. To celebrate, my office got me a cake that read "Happy 38th!!" The "theme" of the "party" was 'Not a day over 35!' I waited all day for someone to tell me it was all a prank, but nobody did. I spent my lunch hour crying in my car. Happy birthday to me. FML

#20732995
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53578) - you deserved it (5150)

On 06/18/2013 at 9:06am - work - by Not a day over 35 (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML

#20724998
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72932) - you deserved it (7217)

On 06/14/2013 at 2:48am - love - by explanations (woman) - United States (Illinois)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: