Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Lioness8197

Offline (the 07/12/2015 at 11:43pm) | Search for a member

Lioness8197

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12000
  • Number of comments : 103
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 13 posted

About Lioness8197 : I love reading and writing.

I love to longboard.

I want a Great Dane and German Shepherd.

I love baseball and football.

Lions are my favorite animal.

I'm a Leo.

I want to become a baker and one day own a bakery that I can call mine.

I'm a very respectful person. Don't assume because I'm a teenager I'm rude, disrespectful and inconsiderate.

Lioness8197's page activity

Visits<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 9:40pm<b>Epickiller</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 8:44am<b>maydayyparade</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 10:46am<b>HuskiesGrey</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 1:37am<b>WolfAvenge</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 1:21pm<b>seetei</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 1:20am<b>freckles430</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 11:00pm<b>the_girl_who_is</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 12:51pm<b>Airshock22</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 12:00pm<b>falsecut</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 8:53pm<b>nottheuglyfriend</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 7:35pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 5:32pm<b>CreatingReality</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 4:59am<b>MissyPastaCreeps</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 5:19pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 11:31am<b>meb123hazel</b> - the 01/07/2015 at 1:33pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 12:07am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 1:04pm

Fucked!<b>Epickiller</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 2:44pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 11:32pm<b>WarrickAvenue</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 11:14am

Lioness8197's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Lioness8197's badges

Lioness8197's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom and I took my senile grandmother to the mall, since she doesn't get out much. She complained it was hot, then took her clothing off in the middle of the food court. It took us thirty minutes to make her put her shirt back on. FML

#20187746
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23212) - you deserved it (1990)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:05am - misc - by Sam - United States (Indiana)

Today, while lighting a cigarette, I learned the hard way that the amount of styling mousse I used to get my curly hair to become manageable, is the roughly same amount that causes it to become highly flammable. FML

#20186892
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9669) - you deserved it (27433)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:11pm - health - by Awkward (woman) - Bahrain

Today, as part of my job as a swimming instructor, I had to help a teenage boy learn how to float. This involves supporting the person's back as they try to float. His boner stood straight up. FML

#20185787
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39598) - you deserved it (3702)

On 11/30/2012 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by julia (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband ran a nice warm bubble bath with extra bubbles. I undressed and slid down into the tub only to have the most ungodly pain go up my backside. Turns out he knocked his razor into the water when he added the bubbles. I now have two butt cracks. FML

#20181043
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30538) - you deserved it (1786)

On 11/27/2012 at 9:32am - misc - by Cracky - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boss called me Dave. Now everyone actually thinks my name is Dave. It's Nathan. I've been working there for 2 years. FML

#20181011
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25184) - you deserved it (2138)

On 11/27/2012 at 8:16am - work - by nato (man) - United States

Today, I ran into my sister, who nobody in the family has seen in six years. She looked very happy working the pole. FML

#20179890
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32964) - you deserved it (3712)

On 11/26/2012 at 3:54pm - misc - by Teddy (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was playing with my four year old cousin. He had a toy whale and said, "Shark!" I corrected him and told him it was a whale. He picked it up, threw it at my face, and yelled, "SHAAARK!" FML

#20176364
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21045) - you deserved it (7388)

On 11/24/2012 at 8:59am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he'd rather play the new Assassin's Creed game or have a night of sex with me. He started crying from indecision. FML

#20176354
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37555) - you deserved it (11812)

On 11/24/2012 at 8:54am - intimacy - by ladylol (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML

#20174027
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25258) - you deserved it (1791)

On 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm - work - by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend decided to break the news that she wanted us to be "just friends." However, she did it not in just any old way - while ice-skating. I'm currently in hospital getting stitches in my arm after I tripped in shock and she ran me over. FML

#20173269
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22581) - you deserved it (1420)

On 11/22/2012 at 12:35am - love - by Ice cold (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend decided to break the news that she wanted us to be "just friends." However, she did it not in just any old way - while ice-skating. I'm currently in hospital getting stitches in my arm after I tripped in shock and she ran me over. FML

#20173269
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22581) - you deserved it (1420)

On 11/22/2012 at 12:35am - love - by Ice cold (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I tried to motivate my 9-year-old sister to clean her room. She said she'd only agree if she could kill me. Thinking she was just kidding around, and not a total psychopath, I said sure. She ran to her room shouting, "Yes! I'm gonna use the big knife!" She's still cleaning now. FML

#20172481
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28224) - you deserved it (5983)

On 11/21/2012 at 2:34pm - kids - by anon - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, a nearby volcano erupted for the second time. We were all urged to keep our windows and doors closed in case of ash clouds. My father responded by opening every window and door and shouting, "Come at me, bro!" FML

#20171802
172 comments

Today, I called off my engagement, after finding out my fiancé is cheating on me. I recently started a new job, and in anticipation of getting married, I asked that my username include his surname. They can't be changed, so now I get to log in every day under that sorry bastard's surname. FML

#20170919
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27356) - you deserved it (8693)

On 11/20/2012 at 12:22pm - love - by notAMrs (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went to Target with my dad, and he told me to get in the shopping cart. I thought he was being cool and wanted to push me around. He snorted and said he was thinking about crashing me into a car and suing the driver. FML

#20167613
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19340) - you deserved it (2239)

On 11/18/2012 at 2:04am - misc - by creys - United States



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: