Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

LilyLi

Offline (yesterday at 1:06am) | Search for a member

LilyLi

78Fucked!

LilyLiLilyLi
  • Town/Country : New Haven, United States
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 768
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About LilyLi : Yale

LilyLi's page activity

Visits<b>Scryll</b> - 8 hours ago<b>jmcgee17</b> - 13 hours ago<b>seeoseek</b> - 15 hours ago<b>Matheo</b> - 17 hours ago<b>Recoveryben</b> - 20 hours ago<b>WipeHour</b> - 23 hours ago<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - yesterday at 3:36am<b>doubledutchy</b> - yesterday at 2:15am<b>pikon</b> - yesterday at 1:10am<b>_kyleG_</b> - yesterday at 11:24pm<b>esemexicano</b> - yesterday at 10:38pm<b>LeFrancaisRaleur</b> - yesterday at 9:23pm<b>fangirlofthings</b> - yesterday at 9:19pm<b>LevyLove</b> - yesterday at 5:15pm<b>rainbow_llamas</b> - yesterday at 11:39am<b>munzapoppa</b> - yesterday at 11:37am<b>dewberry2001</b> - yesterday at 9:36am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 5:15am

Fucked!<b>Matheo</b> - 11 hours ago<b>_kyleG_</b> - yesterday at 5:24am<b>LeFrancaisRaleur</b> - yesterday at 3:23am<b>rainbow_llamas</b> - yesterday at 5:40pm<b>munzapoppa</b> - yesterday at 5:37pm<b>dewberry2001</b> - yesterday at 3:36pm<b>AscendV</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 3:47am<b>Markovski</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 11:00pm<b>moron011</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 6:05am<b>IvyRizzzzoli</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 3:54am<b>a_wiener_d0g</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 3:52am<b>hellpop</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 11:29pm<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 10:12pm<b>gavdarv</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 11:57am<b>youngmuller1</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 10:00am<b>sdroze1389</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 5:11am<b>Urpoppy</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 6:57pm<b>cheyyeee</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 7:39am

LilyLi's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of LilyLi's badges

LilyLi's favorite FMLs

Today, I was supporting my aunt as she gave birth. She was getting tired during the pushing stage, so I tried to encourage her by making a show of pushing as well with each contraction. I got a little too into it and accidentally gave birth to a little turd of my own. FML

Today, my grandpa told me he was going to be eating out tonight, and I asked at which restaurant. He replied "Your gran's room." and winked. I didn't need that mental image, at all. FML

#21409445
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30350) - you deserved it (2672)

On 05/13/2015 at 12:00pm - misc - by -_- (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I met my boyfriend's best friend. She was a girl he's known for years, and I respected that. She was sweet, until my boyfriend went to the bathroom and she threatened to stab me if I don't leave him. He doesn't believe me, and accused me of having serious jealousy issues. FML

#21340122
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37064) - you deserved it (2401)

On 01/19/2015 at 8:35am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my dad and I got into an argument, and he ended up calling me a son of a bitch. My mom heard and started arguing with him over him calling her a bitch. Three hours later, I'm now staying at my gran's house with my mom and hoping her threats of a divorce weren't for real. FML

#21241796
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41542) - you deserved it (3169)

On 08/20/2014 at 4:08pm - misc - by sonofaneuroticwench (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I told my husband that I'm jealous of all the other girls whose husbands always take pictures of them together and post them online. He responded by posting a picture of himself, with me on the toilet in the background, captioned "The bitch on the pot." FML

#21241016
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43754) - you deserved it (16633)

On 08/19/2014 at 2:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I gave up trying to make any friends at my job as a firefighter. I'm the lone female, and am the subject of gossip with the older men. Anyone I try to befriend ends up hitting on me, while others won't even talk to me because their wives are jealous. FML

#21159616
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48991) - you deserved it (5275)

On 06/01/2014 at 5:53pm - work - by anikah (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my 26-year-old boyfriend came to my apartment to spend the night for the first time. He brought a "blankie" that he insisted was the only thing that could help him sleep. That "blankie" was his ex-girlfriend's silk nightgown. FML

#20833570
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52332) - you deserved it (3960)

On 08/12/2013 at 10:30am - love - by iwearsilkgownstoeatwaffles (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a mosquito bite on my chest. Due to a severe allergic reaction it has swollen my left breast a cup size. The first thing my boyfriend said was, "Hey look! I can finally see one of them." FML

#20667435
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61385) - you deserved it (6018)

On 05/16/2013 at 5:36pm - intimacy - by Urgghh (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I finally got the courage to make a move on the guy I've been crushing on. I asked him if he would like to go see a movie with me. He answered, "Sorry, I've already seen it." I didn't even mention any particular movie. FML

#20651541
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53561) - you deserved it (3958)

On 05/09/2013 at 3:01am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

#20640901
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50360) - you deserved it (7095)

On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)

Today, I texted my boyfriend saying that I couldn't wait for him to get home and see my costume, and that I had dressed up as a naked lady. He texted back asking if I could dress up as someone who was making dinner instead. FML

#20142541
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30835) - you deserved it (6520)

On 11/01/2012 at 3:54am - intimacy - by okay._. - United States (California)

Today, I had just bought a new $60 basketball and decided to go try it out. Five minutes into playing, the ball decided to roll into the hands of a little girl, who then said, "Mine". I thought it was cute, until she skipped over to her parent's car and they drove off. FML

#20068584
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28878) - you deserved it (4817)

On 09/12/2012 at 4:52am - kids - by Bitchjackedmyball - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I received my best compliment of the year so far when an ER doctor commented positively on the clarity of my urine sample. FML

#19992508
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17976) - you deserved it (1956)

On 07/30/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

#18974920
217 comments

Today, my boyfriend was introducing me to some business partners. As he was going along telling me their names, when he introduced me, he called me by my best friend's name. FML

#16043135
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38923) - you deserved it (3368)

On 05/04/2011 at 10:50am - love - by ohmylantis (woman) - United States (Ohio)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: