Lillias

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Offline (the 05/23/2015 at 9:02pm)

Lillias

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 28 October 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 12449
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Lillias :

Lillias's page activity

Visits<b>classicate</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 2:17am<b>eggnog5000</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 10:21am<b>iT_Cereal</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 4:40am<b>holymacabre</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 8:59pm<b>redstone7693</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 6:45pm<b>TurboButton</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 9:37pm<b>TheDoctor10</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 3:14am<b>KJFK25</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:43am<b>THEDUDE1553566</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 8:58am<b>AnCermet</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 6:14pm<b>doctor__who</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 10:49am<b>10showgirl</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 12:27pm<b>Wrex</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 5:19pm<b>LC3290</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 12:31am<b>tarynitupp</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 4:21am<b>Welshite</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 8:20pm<b>yellowchocobo</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 12:01pm<b>Fonzie420</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 10:55am

Lillias's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of Lillias's badges

Lillias's favorite FMLs

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

by beemove / 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I discovered the real reason my husband was distraught last week and has been acting moodily ever since. An attractive girl he was secretly having sex chats with online confessed to him that "she" was actually a guy. FML

by -__- / 12/27/2013 at 4:49pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I went on a 70-mile drive to the next town over to finally meet this beautiful girl I had talked to online. To my surprise, she looked exactly how she did in her pictures, minus the ring on her finger and the fiancé who wanted to punch me in the face. FML

by William Johnson / 12/26/2013 at 6:57pm / United States (Alaska) / Love

Today, I realized my family is more excited to see my girlfriend than they are to see me. FML

by Anonymous / 12/25/2013 at 6:19pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML

by .... / 12/23/2013 at 9:48pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time, after he repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me. He passed out halfway through. FML

by JoshuasGirl / 12/23/2013 at 2:13pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, my mother was reading an annual Christmas letter from an old university friend. When she remarked that she could have married him instead of my father, I replied that she wouldn't have had me then. She then said, "Exactly, I could have had his daughter instead." FML

by rejected / 12/23/2013 at 5:44am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, I went to a nativity play. My husband showed up late and drunk, and I had to explain to him why booming "Yeah! Time to get baby Jesus up in this shit!" when our son was about to go on stage got us kicked out. FML

by bastard / 12/22/2013 at 4:28pm / United States / Kids

Today, it's been a little over a month since my dad started taking yoga lessons. We always joked around behind his back that he was just doing it so he could get flexible enough to suck himself off. Well, that joke was confirmed as reality when I walked in on him trying just that. FML

by bleach bleach bleach / 12/22/2013 at 12:22pm / United States (Nevada) / Intimacy

Today, a man started a deep conversation with me at the bus stop about life, death, and the miracles of things we take for granted every day. I was really enjoying it until he looked at his watch and said, "Oh shit, mushrooms make me lose track of time!" and ran off into the night. FML

by whatjusthappened / 12/20/2013 at 3:45am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I canceled my Gamefly account. Seems that was the only thing keeping us together. FML

by Anonymous / 12/19/2013 at 3:52pm / United States / Love

Today, I found out the money my husband's been funneling from our bank account wasn't for drugs or gifts for another girl like I thought. It was for a guy he stupidly believed was a foreign diplomat, who supposedly needed to bribe officials in order to send us several million dollars. FML

by you fucking idiot / 12/19/2013 at 12:20pm / United States (Washington) / Money

Today, I found out that I take long enough showers for my boyfriend to sleep with my sister and put everything back to normal before I get out. I found out when I needed more shampoo that was in a shopping bag in my room. FML

by mystery / 12/07/2013 at 4:55pm / United States (North Dakota) / Intimacy

Today, my wife made me a Sex Rewards Chart, where I get points by doing chores and such, and 50 points gets me some action. She refuses to even look at me if I haven't earned the points, and is contemplating sleeping alone in the guest room until I earn more points. FML

by feiedbutter / 12/07/2013 at 9:55am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy