About Lillias :
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Today, my dad asked if I'd help him clean the gutters. I was given the responsibility of holding the ladder while he went on the roof. All I heard was laughter before a year's worth of rotting vegetation landed on top of my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17924) - you deserved it (1811)
On 10/28/2011 at 4:59pm - misc - by Weldingtags (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was trying to find my first message on Facebook. When I was reaching the bottom, I saw a message from my old crush. It contained a paragraph confessing her love for me and asking me to write back. Don't know how I missed that one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31598) - you deserved it (5064)
On 09/30/2011 at 10:57pm - love - by lostlove (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my girlfriend changed her relationship status on Facebook to 'It's Complicated' because I didn't give her my last cookie. This happens all the time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23856) - you deserved it (8391)
On 09/28/2011 at 10:28pm - love - by danthecomplicate - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29076) - you deserved it (2036)
On 09/10/2011 at 9:54pm - health - by sadddddd (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, I received an email from my boyfriend. It contained a link to a site that was titled "How to Give Head". It also said "Have a nice day!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19596) - you deserved it (5185)
On 09/07/2011 at 12:16pm - intimacy - by thismakesmesad (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my paranoid wreck of a girlfriend read a text message on my phone from a woman asking if I was coming over for dinner. The woman was my mom. My girlfriend stormed out and hasn't answered my calls all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22084) - you deserved it (2633)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:08pm - love - by mommydearest (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)
Today, my dad looked me dead in the eyes and told me that if I wanted to join the Lingerie Football League, I would have his approval. His drunken friends nodded in agreement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25159) - you deserved it (2068)
On 08/26/2011 at 7:32pm - misc - by Alexis - United States (Virginia)
Today, this girl who has been stalking me for almost 7 months sent me a 12 page text comparing her love for me with her passion for cheese. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27814) - you deserved it (2334)
On 08/22/2011 at 1:19pm - love - by Say Cheese - United States (Michigan)
Today, after coming back from deployment, I found a homeless guy had broken into my house and made it his home for the last 5 months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29789) - you deserved it (1625)
On 08/11/2011 at 7:38pm - work - by Username - United States
Today, my girlfriend freaked out on me because I answered her call on the first ring. According to her, it implies that I'm desperate, always horny, and just want her for the sex. Just last week she got pissed because I waited three rings to answer. Apparently that means I'm cheating on her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34374) - you deserved it (4578)
Today, I got a complaint from my neighbor about a little girl staring at her through my guest bedroom window for the past month. I live alone. And now I'm scared to live in my own house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45882) - you deserved it (2383)
On 08/03/2011 at 12:04am - misc - by soccerbuddyz - United States (Florida)
Today, I was in a pool locker room, surrounded by semi-naked people. While changing into my clothes, I accidentally pushed a button on my phone, causing it to make the loud, unmistakable camera shutter sound effect. Everyone definitely heard it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27312) - you deserved it (4233)
On 07/22/2011 at 1:36pm - misc - by Roode (man) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37161) - you deserved it (2676)
On 07/20/2011 at 9:38am - misc - by therundown - United States (Ohio)
Today, my neighbor finally cut the grass on his front lawn. At 2 in the morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24429) - you deserved it (2621)
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blow job for the first time. He posted it on Facebook and can't understand why I'm angry with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35754) - you deserved it (7120)
On 07/15/2011 at 12:53am - intimacy - by krissy8799 - United States (Tennessee)
Monday 17 June 2013
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