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Yesterday, I started my first day working at a toddler day care center . At one point I decided to play "got yur nose" with one of the kids . It turns out this kid has a physical birth abnormality on his face . I got his nose.. . his prosthetic nose .
YESTERDAY, MAH GRLFRIEND AND I WERE GETTING INTIMATE AND PLANNING ON HAVING SEX FOR THE FRST TIME. I PICKED HER UP OFF THE COUCH, AND IN SO DOING, ACCIDENTALLY LIFTED HER TOO HIGH, PUTTING HER HEAD THROUGH THE CIELING. SHE HAD A MILD CONCUSSION. FML
Today my son said "Mommy sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replid "Well honey that's normal an okay." I then askd when it happens to which he said "Well sometimes when watching Scooby Doo an Shaggy comes out dressd in lady clothes." mega FML
yesterday my 5 year old nephew showd me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I looool smild an said, ( Wow! Now, how about some blue martians! ) He lookd at me an replid, ( How about some blue shut the fuck up?! ) FML
Friday 27 March 2015