LilTiki559

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Offline (the 09/13/2016 at 3:52am)

LilTiki559

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 July 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5498
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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LilTiki559's page activity

Visits<b>happypenguins</b> - the 07/27/2016 at 2:43am<b>hfmayo</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 12:42pm<b>jordanwilbanks</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 1:02pm<b>chevylyfe_97</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 2:10pm<b>weeyin12</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 3:52am<b>CassJT</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 7:43am<b>whitetiger13131</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 10:45pm<b>kellilynn</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 4:09pm<b>TheCitizens96</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 10:49am<b>sierra142</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:28am<b>Hawx07</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 11:31pm<b>Samiepoo</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 2:41pm<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 12:35pm<b>avatarwill5</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 12:17pm<b>BreannaLeeRenee</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 11:37am<b>jleon3</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 12:26am<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 9:56am<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 6:29pm

LilTiki559's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of LilTiki559's badges

LilTiki559's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking out of my girlfriend's house with her when I saw her thong drying on the rack. I picked it up, sniffed it and put it on my face as a joke. She replied with, "Those are my mother's." FML

by Anonymous / 01/16/2013 at 12:52am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was blessed with a girlfriend who loves giving blowjobs. And cursed with a girlfriend who is also somehow really bad at them. FML

by Janitoro / 11/22/2012 at 8:19pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had sex with this guy I had been crushing on for five years. It took longer to put my clothes back on than he lasted. FML

by le_evan / 10/29/2012 at 4:49pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my grandma took it upon herself to give me the sex talk. After explaining the mechanics in excessive detail, she said I shouldn't be afraid to sleep around. Apparently, I need to be comfortable with the man who'll be "conning me into blowing him for the next 50 years." FML

by fiftyshardsofbroccoli / 10/26/2012 at 1:58pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I spent hours crafting a tiara to look like the princess from my boyfriend's favourite game series, Zelda. I sent him a picture of me wearing it, and got the reply: "Sure, that's nice, but you'd be better as Majora." FML

by MT / 09/19/2012 at 1:25pm / Finland / Love

Today, I was excited to get my first writing assignment since starting law school. I found out that I have to write a paper defending free speech. This wouldn't be a problem if I didn't have to defend the Westboro Baptist Church and if I weren't a former Marine. FML

by LawStudent / 09/19/2012 at 10:54am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML

by -___- / 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Right as she orgasmed, she screamed out Megatron's name. When I later confronted her about this, she said that she always had a crush on him and wanted to be queen of the Decepticons. I've been dating this lunatic for a year and half now. FML

by Loserbot / 09/03/2012 at 9:02pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that I'm not actually allergic to chocolate, when my mom freely admitted to me that she made it up when I was a child because she didn't want to share any cookies with me. FML

by Sarah / 08/30/2012 at 8:58am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I learned that my son goes on online chat rooms and has sexual fantasy role-play. To make matters worse, the characters he uses are from My Little Pony. FML

by FMLMom / 08/08/2012 at 4:02am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to be nice and pay a social visit to my slightly deranged grandpa. I ended up politely sitting through two hours of him lecturing me on how he "invented the modern tap", then on how sex is an Illuminati invention to "give sluts the STDs they need to kill us all". FML

by yeah okay then / 08/03/2012 at 7:50pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML

by cortanaisahobot / 07/19/2012 at 4:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

by Bontempi / 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

by Bontempi / 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm / France / Miscellaneous