Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

LilTiki559

Offline (the 01/26/2015 at 12:11pm) | Search for a member

LilTiki559

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 27 July 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3016
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

LilTiki559's page activity

Visits<b>CassJT</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 7:43am<b>whitetiger13131</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 10:45pm<b>kellilynn</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 4:09pm<b>TheCitizens96</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 10:49am<b>sierra142</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 3:28am<b>Hawx07</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 11:31pm<b>Samiepoo</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 2:41pm<b>toshaleigh</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 12:35pm<b>avatarwill5</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 12:17pm<b>BreannaLeeRenee</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 11:37am<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 11:22am<b>jleon3</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 12:26am<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 9:56am<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 6:29pm<b>AHSFan</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 1:35pm<b>yus</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 11:14pm<b>brasiliano</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 5:39pm<b>sydneysays</b> - the 12/31/2014 at 7:24pm

LilTiki559's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of LilTiki559's badges

LilTiki559's favorite FMLs

Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML

#21311570
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36185) - you deserved it (5460)

On 12/04/2014 at 6:46pm - kids - by aprouddaddy - Sent from mobile version

Today, on a dimly lit red eye flight, I woke up to see my mom's head bobbing up and down in my dad's lap. I guess giving out stealthy blow jobs next to your sleeping son is no big deal. FML

#21311441
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42338) - you deserved it (2991)

On 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML

#21306254
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36041) - you deserved it (5972)

On 11/26/2014 at 2:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I met my best friend's girlfriend for the first time. After a few hours of talking and eating, she followed me to the bathroom and said, dead serious, ''If you ever touch him or get too close to him, I will cut you''. I've known him for twelve years, they have been dating for a month. FML

#21305050
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38896) - you deserved it (2989)

On 11/24/2014 at 8:44am - love - by ohwell (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I started to get horny while watching TV with my husband. I tried turning him on by telling him I wanted his cock. He cheerfully replied without looking away from the TV, "If only I gave a fuck, babe, if only I gave a fuck!" FML

#21304429
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37631) - you deserved it (4279)

On 11/23/2014 at 11:34am - intimacy - by 404: fuck not given (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my grandpa came into my room and asked for a pen. As I gave it to him, he let rip the foulest fart I've ever smelled in my life, and walked out without a word. 2 hours later, the smell is not only still there, it's filled the room. Looks like I'm sleeping downstairs on the couch tonight. FML

#21304373
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28481) - you deserved it (2530)

On 11/23/2014 at 7:52am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I spent nearly an hour helping a customer pick out an engagement ring. I rang him up, picked out a super cute box for the ring, and wished him luck. Later I realized I never put the ring inside the box. FML

#21304265
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31170) - you deserved it (15451)

On 11/23/2014 at 1:10am - misc - by KilledTheMoment - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was having some rare good sex with my husband, when he suddenly said "I'm fuckin' BORED," and pulled out so he could go play his video games. FML

#21303901
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38586) - you deserved it (4321)

On 11/22/2014 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Kilkenny)

Today, my wife and I decided to try out role playing. She ended up having an anxiety attack when I said she wasn't turning in her homework. FML

#21301827
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35081) - you deserved it (3660)

On 11/19/2014 at 12:27am - intimacy - by jigglypluff (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I went out to get milk from the garage fridge for my mom. The moment I stepped out, my foot settled on the neighbor's boa, who likes to escape. After my mom finally opened the door to my frantic shouting, she spotted the snake, slammed the door, and locked both of us outside. FML

#21301160
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32705) - you deserved it (2634)

On 11/18/2014 at 12:35am - animals - by blindsparrow - United States (California)

Today, a customer said the pants she was buying rang up more than advertised. I quietly told her plus-sizes were not on sale. The customer yelled in front of a whole line of people, "So I'm fat and can't read! Any other insults you'd like to throw at me?" and stormed out of the store. FML

#21301098
121 comments

Today, after realizing my flashcards had fallen out of my binder, I asked my teacher if I could quickly go to my locker to get them. She said no and told me to go sit down. As soon as class ended, I went to my locker and brought them to her. Her response? "Why didn't you ask me to get these during class?" FML

#21301020
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35098) - you deserved it (2470)

On 11/17/2014 at 10:10pm - work - by ohgosh... (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28747) - you deserved it (3449)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I'm old enough to be looking at houses to buy, but not old enough to get past the idea that they might be affordable because they're haunted. FML

#21300362
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25428) - you deserved it (5206)

On 11/16/2014 at 10:07pm - misc - by boo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend threatened to break up with me if I don't satisfy his "needs." By "needs", he means me wearing a diaper during foreplay. FML

#21297687
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42849) - you deserved it (4327)

On 11/12/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by honey, no boo-boo (woman) - United States



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: