Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

LilCheeno

Offline (7 hours ago) | Search for a member

LilCheeno

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 30633
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About LilCheeno : Nothing really to learn about me.

My 2 favorite sports are football and basketball.

My favorite football team are the 49ers (And no I'm not a bandwagon, I was raised to be a 49er fan) and my favorite basketball team are the Warriors.

I listen to any music that I think is good.

LilCheeno's page activity

Visits<b>Peeves</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 11:42pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 8:35am<b>TheEmoSuperman</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 11:29pm<b>Memma</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 2:54pm<b>ethan_unoxx</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 6:54pm<b>Kevin_Kestel</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 12:47am<b>thelittlemissy</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 5:59am<b>Door_Productions</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 2:40am<b>iloveclowns</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 11:53am<b>gotaplanstan</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 3:33pm<b>LickitungJr</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 11:14pm<b>SundayNightSix</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 12:24am<b>straww</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 6:31am<b>Venasaur1</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 12:21am<b>ChenEighty</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 8:03am<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 4:41am<b>MickiJ</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 7:43pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 10:08pm

LilCheeno's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of LilCheeno's badges

LilCheeno's favorite FMLs

Today, I reprimanded three students for sleeping, five for not having books, and kicked three out for texting in class. One student yelled at me for a bad grade, and another stormed out for a failing exam score. I teach at a four-year university. FML

Today, I strained so hard while on the toilet that I gave myself a nosebleed. FML

#21286665
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24295) - you deserved it (4162)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:00pm - health - by Discipl (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was being interviewed for a grant over the phone. When asked why I wanted to go to school to be an OB nursing assistant, I panicked and yelled, "BECAUSE VAGINAS ARE FASCINATING!" into the receiver. FML

#21286497
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23655) - you deserved it (9727)

On 10/27/2014 at 7:05pm - health - by lady parts - United States (Illinois)

Today, I spent an hour painstakingly disassembling my antique mirror after discovering a stack of papers behind the back board. I finally got hold of one corner, and pulled out - a newspaper from 2007 and instructions for an IKEA bed. FML

#21286426
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22869) - you deserved it (3753)

On 10/27/2014 at 5:18pm - misc - by TukTuk (woman) - Germany (Sachsen)

Today, I took my girlfriend for what I thought would be a romantic horse-drawn carriage ride. We didn't expect the horse to die in the middle of it. FML

#21286332
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41376) - you deserved it (3103)

On 10/27/2014 at 2:48pm - love - by subduedbeast - United States

Today, it's my 20th birthday. I recently came home from college to visit my family, after my mother had a stroke a few weeks back. She ended up being the only person who remembered to get me anything. She also thinks it's still 2009. FML

#21286282
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30839) - you deserved it (2576)

On 10/27/2014 at 12:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I watched my co-worker throw the mother of all temper tantrums. He's a radio personality, and just learned that he's not famous enough to use the "Don't you know who I am?" line to get out of a traffic ticket. FML

#21286268
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26676) - you deserved it (2407)

On 10/27/2014 at 12:25pm - work - by Radio GaGa (man) - Canada

Today, I overheard my co-workers talking about how they don't need flu shots because everyone else gets them. These people are in the medical industry. FML

#21286250
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27955) - you deserved it (2670)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:40am - work - by Silbax1 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I cut myself pretty badly with a knife. I was bleeding quite a lot, so I yelled to my husband to bring me some kitchen roll, along with the first aid kit. He rushed in with the roll… to clean the floor. FML

#21286263
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25995) - you deserved it (2854) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/27/2014 at 10:22am - health - by DiiiDiiine (woman) - France (Limousin)

Today, my friend drove up a parking lot and I unbuckled my seatbelt as soon as we were parked. He then suddenly saw a better spot right in front and moved his car. When I got out, a police officer approached me, saying I wasn't wearing my seatbelt. I was fined for that. FML

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29269) - you deserved it (4204)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, there was a laundry basket of my clothes sitting in my room. My dad asked me if they were clean or not. When I said I didn't know, he picked up a piece of my clothing, sniffed it, and said it smelled fine. That piece of clothing just so happened to be my underwear. FML

#21285867
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25957) - you deserved it (4996)

On 10/26/2014 at 8:05pm - misc - by socreepedouticanteven - United States (West Virginia)

Today, at my apartment complex, I was carrying a bag of trash up to the dumpster. A guy stopped his car and helped me carry it the rest of the way. I thanked him and he asked me out. I explained that I was married. He grabbed the trash bag and carried it back to my apartment. FML

#21285821
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31246) - you deserved it (3363)

On 10/26/2014 at 6:46pm - love - by mellielynnemily - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to give my boyfriend a blowjob. Barely 20 seconds in, he said: "I'll be honest, this is TERRIBLE." FML

#21285558
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32823) - you deserved it (6662)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:25am - intimacy - by soisblueballsdickhead (woman) - United States

Today, my son asked for my help with a personal matter. I was flattered that he trusted me, since he's a paranoid, untrusting psycho. Turned out he wanted to use my locksmith skills to break into his ex's house and "teach her a lesson" for breaking up with him after he cheated on her. FML

#21285546
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30579) - you deserved it (4227)

On 10/26/2014 at 9:54am - kids - by Bob H. (man) - Canada (Quebec)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: