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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my roommate confronted me about my eating disorder. She described in length how emaciated-looking my chest has become and how she only wants to help. Except that I don't have an eating disorder. My sternum is deformed and I have only recently become confident enough to wear low-cut tops. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27351) - you deserved it (1586)
On 03/09/2010 at 3:57am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, I agreed to let my boyfriend cover every inch of my body in whipped cream and lick it off. We were both enjoying it until his 9 year old sister walked in and started crying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8769) - you deserved it (15543)
On 03/07/2010 at 10:46am - intimacy - by fml (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, we were drawing self-portraits in school. I'm horrible at art, so I turned to the person next to me and stated that mine looked really ugly. He replied saying, "No, it looks exactly like you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17176) - you deserved it (4548)
On 02/22/2010 at 4:24pm - misc - by quasimodo - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30392) - you deserved it (2864)
On 12/29/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by sickofsick - United States
Today, I finally told my girlfriend I love her. She corrected my grammar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17473) - you deserved it (6440)
On 12/27/2009 at 7:37pm - love - by ITalkGood - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was snuggling with my boyfriend on the couch. We ended up falling asleep, and when I woke up I felt a slobberly substance running down my face. It turns out, my boyfriend drooled so much, it filled my ear and overflowed onto my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29910) - you deserved it (2681)
On 11/23/2009 at 4:11pm - love - by TheGirl (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, it was the elections for Student Council President. I decided to be nice and vote for the only other competitor because it was her birthday. I lost by one vote. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12847) - you deserved it (34351)
On 10/18/2009 at 8:25am - misc - by presidont (woman) - Switzerland
Today, I decided to propose to my girlfriend on the Charles Bridge in Prague. A little boy thought it would be fun to chase a flock of pigeons towards me. I freaked out and dropped the 2 carat diamond ring. Into the river. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46503) - you deserved it (7584)
On 09/22/2009 at 2:30pm - misc - by sadguy (man) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)
Today, my family bet me $20 to wear a Disney Princess hat for the entire day around a theme park. I am 17 years old. We decided to go for lunch in one of the restaurants. After we finished, a woman gave my parents a leaflet on how to cope with disabled children. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27426) - you deserved it (7017)
On 08/21/2009 at 7:51pm - misc - by Becky (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)
Today, I finally got the courage to approach a girl. I've never done anything like this before. She stared me down, not saying a word, until I felt so little that I just walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36763) - you deserved it (6526)
On 08/13/2009 at 6:30pm - love - by Mark (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, it was my birthday. The only call I received was from my stalker, who sang happy birthday with a japanese accent and asked if he could be my "special present". FML
I agree, your life sucks (40948) - you deserved it (337)
On 08/04/2009 at 9:33pm - misc - by andi0804 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I realized my new kitten is the spawn of the devil. It decided to go get itself stuck in a tree. I tried to climb up to rescue it. But it kept climbing higher. I was about to grab the cat when I fell. The cat then jumped down and started purring. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35069) - you deserved it (6445)
On 07/13/2009 at 11:03pm - animals - by WearingOff (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my mom turned to me and said, "You know, you're the kind of person that has to change literally everything about themselves to get a guy to like you." I thought she was joking so I laughed. She then said "Like that. Your laugh... What is that? Change that." FML
I agree, your life sucks (58838) - you deserved it (3783)
On 07/08/2009 at 5:43pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was eating lunch with my wife. We were having a nice time when a man came up to me. He said, "Hey! Bill how are you?" I wasn't really sure, so being polite I said, "I'm sorry, I can't remember your name." He frowned and walked away. It was my company's Chairman of the Board. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14336) - you deserved it (44278)
On 06/11/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by silly_billy (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my grandmother gave me a huge speech on being abstinent until marriage. Being the honest person that I am, I told her I wasn't a virgin anymore. Instead of being mad and telling me I was going to hell. She asked me what my favourite things to do sexually were. And told me hers in detail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (64622) - you deserved it (14904)
On 04/11/2009 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Monday 20 May 2013
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