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Life_is_FML

Offline (the 06/26/2015 at 3:42am) | Search for a member

Life_is_FML

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 29 February 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3289
  • Number of comments : 104
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 64 posted

About Life_is_FML : I mainly enjoy playing video games (mass effect, fallout, Assasins' creed, etc) as well as playing the saxophone.

Life_is_FML's page activity

Visits<b>acciofrenchhorn</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 12:00am<b>Ava_Darkflame</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 10:30pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 9:59pm<b>fragmen52</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 2:48pm<b>awkwardpony123</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 2:24pm<b>DjeePee</b> - the 05/18/2015 at 11:52am<b>Koth</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 7:13am<b>duckman9</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 2:43am<b>ODST_Panda</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 6:27am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 8:28am<b>umerin</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 10:56pm<b>vanessa_tranz</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 6:19pm<b>danthehuman</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 3:02pm<b>justin1205</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 3:35pm<b>Paco_el_Taco</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 12:43am<b>polarbearpiss</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 9:14am<b>Raleaf</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 6:53am<b>Journiexo</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 11:57pm

Life_is_FML's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Life_is_FML's badges

Life_is_FML's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm five and a half weeks pregnant. One of my coworkers told me that it sucks that I'll have to wait so long to show. I asked her what she meant; she replied, "It's always harder to tell when big girls are pregnant. Can't tell what's fat and what's baby." FML

#21428256
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27963) - you deserved it (4290)

On 06/18/2015 at 8:58pm - work - by pregnantfatty - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my mother got heartburn. She claimed she only gets heartburn when she is near a pregnant woman. She threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't take a pregnancy test, despite there being no way I was pregnant. Turns out, I am pregnant, and my mother's ego has never been bigger. FML

#21427606
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29707) - you deserved it (8535)

On 06/17/2015 at 2:09pm - kids - by RecentCollegeGrad (woman) -

Today, my co-worker told me how "lucky" I am that I "chose" to be a lesbian, because I don't have to deal with "guy drama". I spent two years of my adolescence sleeping at a bus stop and begging strangers for money after I got kicked out of home. FML

#21427509
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34222) - you deserved it (3155)

On 06/17/2015 at 9:31am - misc - by Lesbihonest (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was out for a walk, wearing a T-shirt with a fist on it and the words "Bump it." A guy came up to me, looked at my shirt, shrugged, and punched me in the stomach. FML

#21424919
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24239) - you deserved it (10214)

On 06/12/2015 at 9:42am - health - by fisted (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to endure the most mortifying ambulance ride of my life after my fiancé's cock ring got stuck on my tongue piercing. As I was trying not to choke or vomit, he actually high-fived one of the EMTs and tried to get him to take a picture on his phone. FML

#21424446
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29299) - you deserved it (8552)

On 06/11/2015 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by awkward - United Kingdom (Dumfries and Galloway)

Today, a customer yelled, "I'll bash your fuckin' face in, cunt" at me at 9:30am because we don't serve the lunch menu at breakfast time. Yes, the 15-year-old girl in high school is responsible for McDonald's entire menu. FML

#21424396
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28460) - you deserved it (1739)

On 06/11/2015 at 9:44am - work - by McFuckYouTooCunt (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I'm warning you: never spoon naked with your girlfriend after eating taco bell. The shartpocalypse just might begin in her ass and end on your stomach. FML

#21420039
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29395) - you deserved it (3952)

On 06/03/2015 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at my daughter's wedding celebration, I was doing a Michael Jackson act with a few buddies. It went well until I did the crotch-grab. I yanked my balls too hard and fell to the floor, writhing in agony in front of nearly 70 guests. FML

#21417667
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15258) - you deserved it (23451)

On 05/29/2015 at 4:15pm - health - by not a kiddy fiddler really (man) - United States (California)

Today, my father told me that my mental health issues, which have been confirmed by multiple doctors and tests, are all caused by the fact that I'm slightly overweight and don't exercise a lot. FML

#21417547
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25271) - you deserved it (4141)

On 05/29/2015 at 10:23am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad stood by and nodded in agreement as my sister told me that my clinical depression is "getting REALLY old." FML

#21416569
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27994) - you deserved it (3161)

On 05/27/2015 at 9:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, we were discussing evolution at the super-religious school I'm forced to attend. I mentioned homo sapiens, and my teacher mockingly replied, "You actually believe in homo sapiens? Hahahah!" The whole class started laughing. No, not at the teacher; at me. FML

#21414003
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30315) - you deserved it (2102)

On 05/22/2015 at 1:10pm - misc - by homo fuckofftus (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was fired for not asking a senior citizen for proof that he was over 21 and legally allowed to purchase alcohol. When I told my manager he was clearly over 21, he replied, "But what if he WASN'T?" FML

#21412440
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30118) - you deserved it (3097)

On 05/19/2015 at 7:43am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was talking to a cute guy at my house party and had to fart. Luckily, it was silent. Unluckily, he smelled it, thought my house had a gas leak, and ran to the basement to check the pipes and ensure our safety. FML

#21404933
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26445) - you deserved it (5505)

On 05/05/2015 at 1:41am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I came out as bisexual to my 17-year-old sister. She was quiet for a second, then told me she knows for sure I only have "girl parts". I had to explain to her the difference between being bi and being a hermaphrodite. FML

#21397585
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29893) - you deserved it (3153)

On 04/21/2015 at 7:00pm - intimacy - by Notthatone (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, at the DMV I was told I had to prove, with a doctor's note, that I was an amputee and my disability was permanent to get my placard. Apparently, setting my prosthetic leg on the counter wasn't proof enough, and is considered "threatening". The police were called. FML

#21386342
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38632) - you deserved it (2087)

On 04/02/2015 at 2:43am - health - by usadisvet (man) - United States (Tennessee)



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