About Life_is_FML : Hi. I am what I consider to be an unusual piece of my generation because I prefer reading over most of the crap that goes by for television (save for the walking dead, the Simpsons, South Park, DR FUCKING WHO, Glee, and good ol spongebob of course) but I do consider myself a gamer. ( cod, left for dead2, portal, assassins creed, on and on) I am a vegetarian and I love animals and plan on being an Air Force pilot and fiction writer as my adult career. Not that anyone will ever read my profile lol. But I do
love poetry, katy perry, green day, the Beatles , Queen, evanescence, and ya know, Italian food. AWESOME JUNK THAT IS.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Today, while he was eating chicken, one of my friends asked me why I'm a vegetarian. I responded that I believe in animal rights and don't like the conditions the animals are forced to live in. He looked at me incredulously before explaining that "chickens aren't animals, they're birds." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34708) - you deserved it (7351)
On 04/26/2013 at 9:23am - animals - by revan546 - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, after weeks of insomnia, I fell asleep. This would have been great if my brother didn't wake me up at 3am, screaming because his guild finally took down a raid boss. I'm now grounded for thumping him, and have to do all his chores while sleep deprived. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36292) - you deserved it (4322)
On 04/15/2013 at 12:32am - misc - by do your own ironing (woman) -
Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14224) - you deserved it (49637)
On 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by je_regrette_tout (woman) - Sent from mobile version
Today, during a sleepover at my friend's house, I woke up in the middle of the night with a dire need to pee. As I walked in the dark to the bathroom, I saw a silhouette in a doorway and instictively screamed. Turns out it was my friend's sister's One Direction cutout. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19650) - you deserved it (3013)
On 02/28/2013 at 2:00pm - misc - by Neversleepingthereagain (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I went shopping with my two-year-old nephew. He threw a tantrum in the middle of the store because I would not show him my "boobies". A man came up to us and said I should do what my nephew wanted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28266) - you deserved it (3116)
On 02/17/2013 at 3:02am - kids - by Lesser (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I found a wounded turkey in our backyard. I brought it inside, put it in a cage, and tended to its wounds. I then left. When I got back home, I smelled the wonderful aroma of my mother's cooking. She had prepared a turkey, the one I'd rescued. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17648) - you deserved it (3358)
On 11/13/2012 at 6:17pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)
Today, I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it looked like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it for a couple of hours, giving it food, and rocking it to sleep, my parents found me. Then I realised it was just celery. Too bad it took that long for my meds to kick in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13976) - you deserved it (4415)
On 11/07/2012 at 12:11am - misc - by Squid (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, multiple people admired my elaborate face paint. This happens every Halloween, at least every Halloween since I got badly burnt in a car accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35774) - you deserved it (1346)
On 11/01/2012 at 7:17am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull, City of)
Today, I received another death threat for teaching evolution in college. I'm a geology teacher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18694) - you deserved it (1530)
On 10/18/2012 at 12:58am - work - by satanworshipper - United States (Florida)
Today, my new roommate showed me to my room, which I got a good deal on. I noticed a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I asked, he said his last roommate committed suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleaned, hence the "good deal." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20519) - you deserved it (1225)
On 10/12/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by Dino (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I found a tiny, featherless baby bird. I knew it was impossible, but I tried to keep it alive through the day. Before I could get it to the wildlife center, it died, and when I got all choked up over it, my mom started laughing at me and saying how "weak" I was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17186) - you deserved it (2828)
On 09/18/2012 at 12:19pm - animals - by Birdwatcher (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my over-protective husband went into an extreme fit of jealousy at the sight of me breast-feeding our newborn baby boy. He's trying to make me bottle-feed our boy, because apparently it's "wrong" to let another guy touch my boobs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34795) - you deserved it (3699)
On 07/06/2012 at 1:44pm - love - by wife of a shithead (woman) - Norway (Oslo)
Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10993) - you deserved it (37159) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/02/2012 at 1:06am - love - by Flip (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)
Today, I went to family therapy because my mom wanted the family to be closer. When asked what her biggest disappointment was in life, she turned to me and said, "Having a gay son" then patted my hand, smiled, and said "No offense, honey." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31711) - you deserved it (4956)
On 04/06/2012 at 10:24am - misc - by Sadboy (man) - United States
Today, I found out where a few of my favorite outfits went. My mother had taken them out of my closet, wrapped them, and given them to my cousin as a gift. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24820) - you deserved it (1605)
On 11/28/2011 at 7:01pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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