Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Lichinamo

Online | Search for a member

Lichinamo

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 January 1999 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 88502
  • Number of comments : 186
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 145 posted

About Lichinamo : The reason I have so many FML submissions is because every time a friend gets screwed over I put it up here. I have a lot of friends with problems.

Lichinamo's page activity

Visits<b>Raltizal</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 4:22am<b>dmcintosh</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 8:05pm<b>madilyhatter</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 12:38am<b>PlainWhiteWalls</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 11:30pm<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 4:53pm<b>htreatman</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 10:53pm<b>idance22</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 1:54am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 10:38pm<b>IamHercules</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 12:04am<b>flupsht</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 6:59pm<b>ILoveMyIpad1234</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 2:52pm<b>lisaint</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 7:39am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 1:07pm<b>TheThirdi</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 1:09am<b>penashmul</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 5:50pm<b>deepfreeze78</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 10:50am<b>rawrimadildo__</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 6:17pm<b>doud</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 12:31am

Lichinamo's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Lichinamo's badges

Lichinamo's favorite FMLs

Today, while at my job, a couple became angry with me because I charged them for an extra ranch they'd ordered, as I'm supposed to. When I explained how it says in the menu how any additional sauces are an extra charge, she said nastily, "That's okay, we'll just take it out of your tip". FML

#21388872
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30673) - you deserved it (2213)

On 04/06/2015 at 8:58pm - work - by hexphoenix (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my school had to make an official announcement that students were not permitted to go home due to Zayn Malik leaving One Direction because so many girls were claiming they couldn't focus on school with such a dramatic event occurring. FML

#21381783
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38258) - you deserved it (3124)

On 03/26/2015 at 9:20am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my sister shot my dog with my airsoft gun. When I told my parents, she put on the fakest sobbing I've ever heard, said she didn't even know how to use a gun, and that she saw me shoot my own dog. They believed her and think I need psychiatric help. FML

#21378741
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31491) - you deserved it (1988)

On 03/21/2015 at 1:36am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML

#21361122
462 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44406) - you deserved it (4024)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I'm 8 months pregnant and still waitressing at a local restaurant. There were only 3 of us serving today and things were hectic. One guy bitched me out, saying "Maybe if you lost some weight you'd walk a little faster!" because I wasn't fast enough with his soup. FML

#21359797
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35211) - you deserved it (2397)

On 02/20/2015 at 12:56pm - work - by blahblah1993 - United States (Texas)

Today, while shopping with my 6-year-old daughter, she said, "Mommy, remember you wanna get duck tape!" A middle-aged guy nearby scoffed and told her: "DUCT, not DUCK. Dumb cunt." I ended up having to drive my bawling daughter home with no shopping. FML

#21352119
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43572) - you deserved it (2997)

On 02/08/2015 at 2:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, it's been 3 months since my dog scratched my 9 year old granddaughter after she walked over and repeatedly kicked him. My daughter has disowned me and won't let me see my own grandchildren until I have my companion of 11 years "destroyed". FML

#21343453
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37515) - you deserved it (2576)

On 01/24/2015 at 1:33pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Giurgiu)

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

Today, my girlfriend accused me of being insecure and feeling threatened by the fact that she has a daughter from a previous relationship. She's vaguely right; I feel threatened, but mainly because the psycho keeps threatening to stab me to death when her mom isn't around to hear. FML

#21334989
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31904) - you deserved it (2402)

On 01/11/2015 at 8:03am - kids - by StabStab (man) - Belgium

Today, I was fired for "blatant, inexcusable racism". My boss had asked me which website background I preferred for our company, and I said that white backgrounds are usually best. He thinks that I believe in white supremacy, and that's bad for the company's image. FML

#21334747
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32866) - you deserved it (2423)

On 01/10/2015 at 10:02pm - work - by Jem (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was in the car with my 4-year-old sister and our puppy. Suddenly, she blurted out from the backseat, "I don't love you anymore." Shocked, I asked her to repeat herself. She looked me straight in the eye and said, "The puppy doesn't love you either." FML

#21334677
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29115) - you deserved it (2449)

On 01/10/2015 at 7:15pm - kids - by SadSister:( - United States

Today, I psyched myself up and headed out to a really promising job interview. I was sure I was going to nail it and get my first job. That is, until a bird shat on my head on my way there. Thank you so very much, universe. FML

#21334630
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28554) - you deserved it (2078)

On 01/10/2015 at 5:46pm - work - by sadlrana121 (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I gave a presentation to my college class about life with Tourette syndrome. I only got 3 minutes into it before my asswipe classmates started yelling stuff like "Shit!", "Cock!", and "Bob Saget!" I gave up and went back to my seat in tears as our bored instructor said "Next." FML

#21334608
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34734) - you deserved it (2365)

On 01/10/2015 at 5:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend was making lunch and asked me to pass her the peanut butter. I'll never know why, but as I handed it to her I said the first thing that came to mind: "I really want a dog." She looked at me in horror, then told me to get out of her house. FML

#21334531
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24248) - you deserved it (4268)

On 01/10/2015 at 3:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I went to the supermarket with my husband and kids. A crazy old man started yelling at us and challenged us to fight him outside. Security had to escort us to our car. Why was he so mad? Our cart momentarily blocked his path to the beef jerky samples. FML

#21334513
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28807) - you deserved it (2887)

On 01/10/2015 at 2:22pm - misc - by gotta_respond (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: