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LexxyKayy

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LexxyKayy
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2244
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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LexxyKayy's favorite FMLs

Today, I was petting my cat and I jokingly said out loud, "Oh, the pussy likes it rough? You like that, don't you?" My windows were open and I could hear the neighbors laughing. FML

Today, while I was sneaking a boy out of my room at 2am, I ran into my mom sneaking a man into her room. FML

#19568801
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33309) - you deserved it (9693)

On 05/03/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by dentistrygirl - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were making love for the first time, when out of nowhere my cat meowed from the doorway. My boyfriend sighed, pulled out, and exasperatedly called me a selfish bitch for not having put my cat outside. FML

#19564569
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26368) - you deserved it (4499)

On 05/02/2012 at 6:06pm - intimacy - by S12Sophia (woman) - France

Today, my husband informed me that he has been purposely finishing before me in bed as a form of punishment for beating him at Mario Kart. FML

#19563136
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28472) - you deserved it (5827)

On 05/02/2012 at 11:46am - intimacy - by winnerwinner (woman) - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. When I took my underwear off, she looked at my penis, snorted, and covered her mouth. She claimed that her "allergies" were flaring and we have to wait until they clear up. FML

#19558140
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28996) - you deserved it (3262)

On 05/01/2012 at 12:41pm - intimacy - by rolyat (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend yet again unsuccessfully tried to hold in uncontrollable giggling every time I moaned or sighed during sex. He's 24. I'm terrified of his reaction should I ever reach an orgasm with him. FML

#19557308
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22990) - you deserved it (2584)

On 05/01/2012 at 7:02am - intimacy - by epicsquishii (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my boyfriend gave me a surprise birthday present: herpes. FML

#19556007
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34147) - you deserved it (6015)

On 04/30/2012 at 11:01pm - intimacy - by lowlife123 (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, after putting an ad on Craigslist to sell a coat, I finally got a call. The guy on the phone seemed interested, and was especially curious to know if I could "model" it for him, in "stockings and suspenders." FML

#19552915
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20499) - you deserved it (3085)

On 04/30/2012 at 11:50am - intimacy - by NotAModel (woman) - United States

Today, after a lot of begging, I finally convinced my husband to shave all of his pubes off. Now I can't even look at it without laughing, and he's mad at me for making him do it. FML

#19552078
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6084) - you deserved it (47164)

On 04/30/2012 at 4:25am - intimacy - by kdehshaden (woman) - United States

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. She didnt look away and we stared at each other for a while; then she asked me what I wanted from McDonalds. FML

#19547170
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31418) - you deserved it (8089)

On 04/29/2012 at 11:10am - intimacy - by ShadowJack - United States

Today, my boyfriend figured out that he can bounce small things off of my boobs, and has been doing it every time I look away. FML

#19543963
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21430) - you deserved it (3758)

On 04/28/2012 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by Elise - United States

Today, the novelty of shaving a heart into my pubic hair for my wife vanished, when I woke up to find a collection of scabs around my pubes. FML

#19542663
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12872) - you deserved it (11760)

On 04/28/2012 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Matt (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my wife woke me up by giving my erect penis a Chinese burn. FML

#19540366
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20801) - you deserved it (2161)

On 04/28/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by poo4brains - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML

#19539358
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37776) - you deserved it (2463)

On 04/27/2012 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by yosenfal (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)

Today, I walked into a public restroom to find that they had set up a free health clinic for the homeless; by that I mean that I found one bum inspecting and cleaning the infected, bloody genitals of another bum. FML

#19531341
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22412) - you deserved it (2229)

On 04/26/2012 at 8:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)



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