Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Lesser

Offline (42 minutes ago) | Search for a member

Lesser

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3825
  • Number of comments : 174
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Lesser : I enjoy reading profile pages and one of the things I would like to know is the FML's people submitted and were not accepted were. So for your reading pleasure, this is my FML that I submitted and was denied.

Today, I was listening to some music with my husband. I asked him if he knew what 'a cappella' meant. He thought for a moment and said "Singing with horses?" FML

So there you go. I didn't really expect it to go through, but I thought I would give it a try, and I needed the consolation prize badge.

Feel free to message me if you like, I would love to hear from you.
Have a wonderful day.

Lesser's page activity

Visits<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 11:50pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 9:20pm<b>Scarylizard1798</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 12:08pm<b>PinkieKeen</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 4:22pm<b>AndyBiceps</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 2:26am<b>inner_peace</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 1:49am<b>rkace1988</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 12:58am<b>Mads_1234</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 9:42am<b>zBLAKEz</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 10:55pm<b>SolarFlare</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 4:50am<b>monisv</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 11:57pm<b>oldmanringo</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 6:52pm<b>THELEGENDMRT</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 12:35am<b>salamander461</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 7:35am<b>ThatOtherMegan</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 10:02am<b>darklordofpotato</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 8:53am<b>ribbons</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 4:24pm<b>AlonsoKold</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 5:12pm

Lesser's FML badges

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Lesser's badges

Lesser's favorite FMLs

Today, after I spent two hours trying to teach my girlfriend to play sudoku, she broke up with me, tearfully claiming that I'd made up a fake, imaginary game to make her feel stupid. FML

#20167793
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30593) - you deserved it (3144)

On 11/18/2012 at 7:13am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out I share a birthday with a fictional character who is "untrustworthy" and has a "dark side", so therefore I can't be trusted either. FML

#20163899
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23595) - you deserved it (1964)

On 11/15/2012 at 12:48am - love - by B-Rad (man) - United States

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

#20163281
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47207) - you deserved it (5998)

On 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boss told me to cut my long hair. After coming back to work with a clean cut hairstyle, he apparently thought I was the new guy, and said I was going to be trained by "The long-haired girly-looking idiot." FML

#20163115
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23065) - you deserved it (3262)

On 11/14/2012 at 1:10pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, someone stole my iPhone. I used the Find My iPhone app, and located it in the apartment building next to mine. I can hear the ringing sound I've activated, but nobody will answer the door. FML

#20163099
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22313) - you deserved it (1628)

On 11/14/2012 at 12:50pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the love of my life, and long term partner, sat me down and told me that he feels so comfortable in our relationship that he no longer feels the need to have sex with me, and he doesn't think that that will ever change. FML

#20162862
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31536) - you deserved it (3100)

On 11/14/2012 at 5:36am - intimacy - by nolove - Australia

Today, I received my first ever hand-job. It would have been great if she didn't wipe it across my face when I had finished and storm out of the room. FML

Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML

#20161591
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24896) - you deserved it (2498)

On 11/13/2012 at 7:02am - love - by Med (man) - Netherlands (Groningen)

Today, I arrived home after a hard day's work to see my 12-year-old sister had greased up my 8-year-old brother with butter and olive oil, and was attempting to slide him down the wooden floorboards in the hallway. FML

#20161557
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19579) - you deserved it (1946)

On 11/13/2012 at 5:00am - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I realized that the bird I supposedly heard during the night throughout my childhood is actually the sound my mom makes when she comes. FML

#20160628
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38732) - you deserved it (2696)

On 11/12/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by Heather - United States (Maryland)

Today, I finally met the girl I've been talking to on phone for a while and found her charming in person as well. There's just one problem: she has more facial hair than I do. FML

#20159578
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18415) - you deserved it (5776)

On 11/11/2012 at 9:16pm - love - by x (man) - United States (New York)

Today, due to a health insurance mix up, my schizophrenic girlfriend has been off her meds for a little over a week. She's convinced I can read her mind, and if I don't stop "pretending" she'll slit my throat in my sleep. Her medication won't be available for at least another two weeks. FML

#20159457
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23612) - you deserved it (2231)

On 11/11/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was renovating the house, and my girlfriend asked, "Do you use electrical tape on electrical stuff?" Not knowing where she was going with this, I just gave her a puzzled look. She continued by saying, "Because it's not like people use duct tape on ducks." FML

#20158312
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20052) - you deserved it (2787)

On 11/11/2012 at 12:05am - love - by Danny - United States (Utah)

Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML

#20157750
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24686) - you deserved it (1776)

On 11/10/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)

Today, I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it looked like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it for a couple of hours, giving it food, and rocking it to sleep, my parents found me. Then I realised it was just celery. Too bad it took that long for my meds to kick in. FML

#20151986
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19570) - you deserved it (6368)

On 11/07/2012 at 12:11am - misc - by Squid (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: