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About Lesser : I enjoy reading profile pages and one of the things I would like to know is the FML's people submitted and were not accepted were. So for your reading pleasure, this is my FML that I submitted and was denied.
Today, I was listening to some music with my husband. I asked him if he knew what 'a cappella' meant. He thought for a moment and said "Singing with horses?" FML
So there you go. I didn't really expect it to go through, but I thought I would give it a try, and I needed the consolation prize badge.
Feel free to message me if you like, I would love to hear from you.
Have a wonderful day.
You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.
You sure know how to party?
You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!
Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja
You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, my boss told me to cut my long hair. After coming back to work with a clean cut hairstyle, he apparently thought I was the new guy, and said I was going to be trained by "The long-haired girly-looking idiot." FML
Today, the love of my life, and long term partner, sat me down and told me that he feels so comfortable in our relationship that he no longer feels the need to have sex with me, and he doesn't think that that will ever change. FML
Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML
Today, I arrived home after a hard day's work to see my 12-year-old sister had greased up my 8-year-old brother with butter and olive oil, and was attempting to slide him down the wooden floorboards in the hallway. FML
Today, due to a health insurance mix up, my schizophrenic girlfriend has been off her meds for a little over a week. She's convinced I can read her mind, and if I don't stop "pretending" she'll slit my throat in my sleep. Her medication won't be available for at least another two weeks. FML
Today, I was renovating the house, and my girlfriend asked, "Do you use electrical tape on electrical stuff?" Not knowing where she was going with this, I just gave her a puzzled look. She continued by saying, "Because it's not like people use duct tape on ducks." FML
Today, I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it looked like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it for a couple of hours, giving it food, and rocking it to sleep, my parents found me. Then I realised it was just celery. Too bad it took that long for my meds to kick in. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered "cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML
Thursday 10 April 2014