About Lennes : My name is, as far as you know, Lennes.
I enjoy video games, reading, writing, drawing, and, as of recently, acting. And dark shows. And dark movies. And dark books. And... You know, I just like there to be a little darkness. Not total darkness; more like a lit room with a slightly shadowed corner. A twinge of tragedy and hopelessness acts as a beautiful foil to the light, bringing out its glory to a fuller extent. Like putting salt on a watermelon. God that's good.
I also have a rather bad habit of watching anime far to much, and I find myself disappointed in the fact that it is typically abhorred. I find it narrow minded and obtuse. The abhorring, that is. God that's a great word. Abhor. It just rolls off the tongue. Like melancholy. Ah, another magnificent word.
I generally consider myself a terrible person due to my cynicism and misanthropy in my moments of seriousness. However, I hope to one day make up for this.
About Lennes : My name is, as far as you know, Lennes.
Lennes's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Lennes's favorite FMLs
by ifhehadadickforaheaditdbefuckingsmall / 03/10/2013 at 2:50pm / Cyprus (Nicosia) / Love
by Amanda / 03/10/2013 at 12:08pm / Canada / Kids
by Nogood / 03/10/2013 at 5:09am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
Today, I'm so broke after paying my bills, that I resorted to eating plain garlic butter from the pizzeria down the street for lunch. The worst part: to get the butter, I stormed in and angrily complained, saying they forgot to give it to me. I never even ordered a pizza. FML
by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 6:03pm / United States (South Carolina) / Money
Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML
by je_regrette_tout / 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm / Intimacy
Today, one of my elderly swimming students ran into me at Walmart. Being a polite teenager, I said hi to him. He looked at me surprised and said, "Oh dear! I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!" I'll never forget the look on his wife's face. FML
by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 2:02am / Canada / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend's daughter asked me what would happen if she chose to stop urinating for two weeks. She wanted to know whether it would kill her or just start coming out of her mouth. She's 17-years old, and was deadly serious. FML
by Anonymous / 03/08/2013 at 8:11pm / Argentina (Distrito Federal) / Kids
Today, I showed my wife an article about how frequent orgasms can prevent prostate cancer, as well as increase both partners' overall health. She replied that she wouldn't judge me if I masturbated, as long as I don't use porn. FML
by marriage/celibacy/synonymity / 03/08/2013 at 6:36pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Intimacy
Today, I bought a textbook for my college class. Not only is the £150 book only sold by our teacher, it turned out to be a piece of shit that he obviously wrote, printed, and stapled together at home. When I went to the faculty about it, I was told it's all perfectly legal, and to drop it. FML
by defrauded / 03/08/2013 at 1:44pm / United Kingdom (Argyll and Bute) / Money
Today, my teacher read my story about a haunted house for a class assignment. She liked it very much and turned it in to the office to be sent into a state writing competition. An hour later, I was called to the office where the guidance counselor called my work "disturbing" and said I "need help". FML
by Anonymous / 03/08/2013 at 6:29am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, after my 5-year-old finally got over his grandmother's death, we went to a store and saw a lady that looked exactly like her. She came up to us asking if we saw her grandson; I can't get my son to stop freaking out. FML
by Maxie / 03/07/2013 at 8:55pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids
Today, my boss yelled at me for visiting Facebook on my work computer. He says that since I can't be trusted, I'll be supervised from now on. I was uploading pictures to the company's Facebook page, which I have to do once a week as part of my job. FML
by arknvl / 03/07/2013 at 1:12pm / Norway (Sor-Trondelag) / Work
Today, I was fired from my job for breaking my company's tattoo policy. I have a small scar on my wrist that roughly resembles a heart. My boss insists that it's one of those white ink tattoos. No one will believe me. FML
by crap / 03/07/2013 at 3:17am / United States / Work
by ForeverAlone / 03/06/2013 at 5:28pm / United States (Missouri) / Love
Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML
by RedWaters / 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm / United States / Intimacy
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…
- Today, I’m in China for work. All my work is stored in my Google Drive, directly via the internet.… Today, my mom had to go to one of her relatives’ funeral. She came to borrow a black scarf from me,… Today, after shaking my boss's hand, I noticed that he had a piece of toilet paper stuck to one of…